Uprising Short Story Contest

Wanted: Short Stories from the Uprising Universe. Submitted stories will be filtered and the best ones will be submitted for Voting. The best Winning stories will be published in the upcoming Uprising Anthology. The very best story gets top billing, and the Author will become the new President of Iceland in one of the Uprising books, Russia or China. Other writing contests let you win small prizes or bragging rights. I’ll give you Iceland. Because I can. All of it. The hole place and everything on it. In fiction of course.

Things in Iceland: Chicks, in natural hot springs, hotdogs, rotten shark meat. It's Great!

My Personal Guide

I had to.  After shooting Evil Jim’s that bloody thing just wouldn’t get out of my head.

I had to join the Guide Gun Club. So I looked at what we had at the gun shop and I picked out this little thumper. It’s nothing fancy at all, just a Marlin 1895GBL in .45-70. It’s going to do just fine for my needs. The Guide Gun has always been a gun I’ve wanted since I’ve had just about all the others. Finally got my own.

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I might have to order some Wild West Guns sights for it… but other than that, I’m keeping it nice and simple and stock.  No rail, no red dot, no “Tactical”.  Just Old School Thumping Power.  Gotta love it.

The USA Gave Chavez Cancer


Oh Crap.  Hugo Chavez guessed it.  The USA gave him cancer and he found out about it.  By carefully dosing his Frosted Crazy Flakes every morning, we were able to give him cancer after this 20 year process.  We finally got Kim Jong Il, and now we’re getting him too!  (Insert Evil Laughter Here)

Because it couldn’t have been all the cigars and red meat that the fat bastard has been sucking down all his life… it’s America out to get him.  My hell, I can’t wait until that twat kicks the bucket.  His constantly blaming the USA for everything… Come on.  Doesn’t he have any appreciation for the CIA putting all those hundreds of thousands of Agents in his country to haunt his every move?  No appreciation at all!

Note to all the Agents down there.  Let’s get his Little Dog too…

Borrowed time, buddy.

Things I hate

I hate skinny pasty white guys that dress like and act like Hip Hop stars.  I hate guys that leave the stickers on their flat billed caps.  I hate guys that start every sentence with “Yo, check dis.”
You are not black. Even if you were, you live in Rural Utah.  Give it up, because you look like a jackass.