The Tap Out Affliction

I think Jersey Shore has washed up in the Uintah Basin like an unwanted fist pumping oil slick.  Vernal is a few years behind the rest of the country… thanks to a self induced communal isolationism that Vernal as a community is proud of.  When things wash in, it does so like Katrina into New Orleans… The Jersey Shore thing is all over now, yet the local Young Ones are not quite sure how to apply it.  So we have the Hair and the tight Tshirts that have print that look like enlarged French curtains, as if thats the coolest thing ever… then tight jeans only half on their buttocks and Carhart boots while the guy jumps down out of his Dodge 3500 Diesel as the sun glints off the metallic sticker that they carefully leave on their perfectly flat brim ball cap.  What I don’t get is that most of these guys have literally never been further outside of Utah than Craig Colorado.

My words of advice to these Young Ones… Guys, just be yourself.  You live in Utah.  In the country.  You are surrounded by Cattle and Oil Fields.  The biggest thing that happens here in Vernal is the annual Rodeo and NRA Banquet.  Embrace who you are.  Because if you strip off the Imported Faddish Sillyness – You guys are Cooler than Jersey Shore.  You are better than that.  You ask the JS Crew to get anything done and they’ll ruin it.  Ask you guys to get anything done… and you will repair a Diesel Truck to move an Oil Rig and then gather up a herd of Beef and get it loaded into a trailer… all before breakfast and the next day you’ll go out and hunt a trophy elk and tag it and bag it.   You guys Get Shit Done.  You are independent.  You are capable.   Be proud of that and don’t lower yourself to emulate a pack of slobbering useless idiots on TV.

Sold the Honda Magna

Saturday I unexpectedly made a deal with a family to sell my beloved Honda Magna. The day before, I was having lunch with my Bride and we talked bikes. I decided to just keep the Magna and tweak it to better suit my needs. Seat, tank, pipes. Simple enough.

Then after lunch on Saturday some folks come in to the gun shop and we come to an agreement.  I’m actually kinda torn on selling it.  The VF750C’s engine is truly one of the very best engines ever put into any motorcycle.   Honda really needs to bring back the Magna, but with some more modern upgrades.  But as I say farewell to this bike, I’ll be able to make acquaintance with a new bike.  There are three main options.
First option, is a Kawasaki ZX-1100.  Full sized sport-touring bike.  This is a long range road interstate warrior… exactly what I want and need.  This bike has the range that I wish I had invested in off the bat when I got the Magna.  But it had been awhile since I rode, so it was wisdom to get into something to get my Biker Blood flowing again without spilling it.   But a bike like this… it’s a lot of machine. It’s a Starship that can cross the country at Warp Factor 10 like other bikes cruise at 60.
Second option, if the first one is taken before I get to it… is a Yamaha FZ1.  A Standard Liter Bike, all around easy bike to run on, but with good sized fuel tank that would get me where I wanted to go.  Not the most exciting of machines, but an all around solid bike that would do very well for me.
The third choice actually surprised me.  A Zuke Boulevard.  It’s not much bigger than the Magna, but it does have the fuel tank that I want.  It lacks the Hasty that the Magna has, but with the better fuel economy, bigger tank… it doubles the range that the Magna had. Electronic ignition, computer controlled fuel injection… it would be a very nice machine.  And it’s larger, more comfortable than the Magna… I could deal with that happily but it would be settling.

A lot of guys are telling me that I need to get a Harley.  Sure, I could do an XR1200.  Or a cool Dyna set up like Jax Teller’s… but I don’t want a bike that is loud, and you are just not finding them for around three grand, because that’s all that I’m spending.  I don’t want to Bank Roll a Bike.  I’m not going to carry a note on something that can so easily be ripped out from under you by an idiot in a Cage.

I’m crawling all over’s Classifieds.  But if anyone out there knows of a GOOD bike for around 3 grand… hit me up.  I’m open to good suggestions.


Random thoughts

Tx requiring voters to show I’D.  Of course its discrimination… That would mean the Democrats could only vote once.

Rachel Welch says America is a bunch of porn addicts.  Blah blah blah… I just wanted to see her naked.

Windmills are killing Eagles again in California.  Why not catch the freshly killed birds and roast them to feed the homeless and poor?   Liberals already mock everything else… Why not gobble down Eagles too?

The Energy Secretary says he’s done everything he can to lower gas prices… The guy doesn’t even own a car.  I’m sure his efforts were all in earnest. 

10 grand a plate dinner with Democrats… And they were saying the GOP is out if touch.   Republicans had a fundraiser dinner that I went to… It was 10 bucks.  Hmmm…

John Carter of Mars

I’m going to pass on seeing this movie.  I have to. 
You see… I watched Starship Troopers.  I watched Battlefield Earth.  Left the theater with teeth clenched, fists balled up tight, and tears in my eyes.  Hollywood ruined a couple of my favorite books. 
I didn’t read comic books as a kid, I read thick novel of epic scale.  The comic kids have had it easy.  Ironman. Captain America.  You don’t have be humiliated saying you loved reading it… Or looking at the pictures as the case may be.  But saying Starship Troopers was your favorite book is tantamount to saying you eat boogers.  Those films of my fondest memories were so bad… I just can’t do this again…