The Tap Out Affliction

I think Jersey Shore has washed up in the Uintah Basin like an unwanted fist pumping oil slick.  Vernal is a few years behind the rest of the country… thanks to a self induced communal isolationism that Vernal as a community is proud of.  When things wash in, it does so like Katrina into New Orleans… The Jersey Shore thing is all over now, yet the local Young Ones are not quite sure how to apply it.  So we have the Hair and the tight Tshirts that have print that look like enlarged French curtains, as if thats the coolest thing ever… then tight jeans only half on their buttocks and Carhart boots while the guy jumps down out of his Dodge 3500 Diesel as the sun glints off the metallic sticker that they carefully leave on their perfectly flat brim ball cap.  What I don’t get is that most of these guys have literally never been further outside of Utah than Craig Colorado.

My words of advice to these Young Ones… Guys, just be yourself.  You live in Utah.  In the country.  You are surrounded by Cattle and Oil Fields.  The biggest thing that happens here in Vernal is the annual Rodeo and NRA Banquet.  Embrace who you are.  Because if you strip off the Imported Faddish Sillyness – You guys are Cooler than Jersey Shore.  You are better than that.  You ask the JS Crew to get anything done and they’ll ruin it.  Ask you guys to get anything done… and you will repair a Diesel Truck to move an Oil Rig and then gather up a herd of Beef and get it loaded into a trailer… all before breakfast and the next day you’ll go out and hunt a trophy elk and tag it and bag it.   You guys Get Shit Done.  You are independent.  You are capable.   Be proud of that and don’t lower yourself to emulate a pack of slobbering useless idiots on TV.

13 thoughts on “The Tap Out Affliction”

  1. Honestly, the jersey shore was only mildly entertaining at first because of the half naked women and the soap-style drama they produced. It got played out really quickly. They’re all rich beyond comprehension and they did it by partying and sleeping their way through a summer. Why is it I have to bust my ass on a daily basis to break even at the end of the month, and these uneducated assclowns get to go out and actually make money by ruining my moral system?

  2. OGRE: as a guy who grew up on the Jersey Shore, who inhabited the very boardwalk that is prominently displayed in most of the series (and who has worked at various establishments upon said boardwalk through 8+ years), who enjoyed the various bars and nightclubs advertised on the show (including several that Snookie, Sweetheart and JoWow frequent), who did a little bit of “fist pumping” in his time; who is of pure third generation Roman blood, and who moved on from the scene to become a successful lawyer and Christian, I can say without question that no one is “better” than anyone else. Different maybe, more talented in ways, but not “better”. What we make of ourselves depends on us to a large extent, whether we are from the back woods of North Carolina, the outback of beautiful Utah, or the crazy, Jersey Shore. Let the kids of Utah be kids. If they have the right upbringing, most will grow to be good, honest citizen and servants of God. Oh, and another point…what we all see on the Jersey Shore show represents about 5% of what the real Jersey Shore is all about. It’s a great place. Everyone should visit if they have the time/money.

    1. Sorry James but I have to disagree. We are all created equal in the eyes of the law(or at least that’s what they like us to believe), but not everyone is created equal. Not by a long shot. Different people have different levels of intelligence, that doesn’t mean intelligence directly to relates to whether a person is good or not at all, but it is a difference. Some people are taller or stronger or more attractive, once again these differences do not relate to goodness, but they are differences.

      We like to say everyone is created equal but ts a farse, a lie we tell children to make them feel better about the bully at school or to try and prevent them from forming prejudices.

      There are a whole lot of people walking around that are better humans than someone like Dahmer or Gacy. I have no doubt that I am a better man than Eric Holder, and a better person than Some person who abuses a child, and a better man than some asshole who beats his wife and kids. Those people are pathetic, and dont even deserve to be mentioned.

      On the same coin, I have read of people who are better humans than I may ever be. Men and women who fall on grenades to save their fellows, help free people from slavery, or sacrifice themselves for others. I have never been in such a situation, I do not know if I could rise to their level.

      We should all be judged as equals by the law and by any god which may exist. But we are not all equally good people. Not by a long stretch.

      1. Never said anything about being equal, just that no one is better than another. I should have clarified: in God’s eyes were all the same. I get that there are inherent differences in all. But as to Ogre’s point, the kids in Utah are no “better” than the kids in Jersey. As for the idiot kids on the Jersey Shore, I personally know about two dozen such kids from my youth who grew into very fine adults. I’m a very different 43 year old man from the 21 year old young man who engaged in much of the buffoonish activities that we see the Jersey Shore kids presently involved in, and in the same exact area. If we want to an argument against the Jersey Shore kids, it’s that most aren’t “kids” at all. Two of them are in their 30’s!

        1. You can have “no one is better” and also have “no one said anything about being equal” they are mutually exclusive.

          I think what you are trying to say is that the simple fact that someone is from jersey makes them less of a person than if they were from Utah. That is not what ogre was saying. Notice he capitalized “Jersey Shore” when he wrote about being “better than that”, because he was referring to the stupid people on the show. I’ve never watched the show so I’m forced to assume from all I’ve heard that they are very self-centered and obnoxious. In that case, i would certainly encourage someone to be Better than someone like them. I get what you’re saying but I think your saying it wrong.

          I also get what your saying about being stupid when you were a kid. I was stupid then too, but we have thankfully managed to “better” ourselves since then and now we are “better” people.

          1. *the simple fact that someone is from jersey DOESN’T them less of a person than if they were from Utah.

            Stupid phone.

  3. Positive reinforcement George. I like it. People are, for the most part, much better than they know. We can do a lot more than we do right now, and that’s in noway a derogatory statement, and be happy in doing so. It good to see someone telling folks that they are better than what the money changers tell us.

  4. Well said.
    Since when has being usless and overly dramatic been popular ?
    On second thought, don’t answer that…

  5. Never seen it. Never will. Nor Desperate Housewives, nor Sex and the City, nor Dancing with the Stars/Idols/Football Player of the week or any of the other useless drivel that passes for entertainment.

    I have a hard enough time trying to be true to me. I don’t have time to try and be somebody else.

    And Mogg? I’ll answer it anyway. Back about the time Hollywood got established, but especially once we got more than the three basic channels. We have a basic cable package, only because it makes the cable internet cheaper, and we get three or four shopping channels out of probably twelve total.

  6. Kids searching for identity look to and emulate TV and movies.

    It starts early as TV produced by the rodent shows parents, especially fathers, as idiots.

    I could go on.

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