Horse Pucky

Obama is so full of it, it would be hilarious if it wasn’t for the fact that he was our President.
His asinine remark about Horses and Bayonets reminded me of a few things. We still use Horses in the Army. A lot of them. Facebook is full of pictures of US Soldiers on Horses in the War Zone. Because nothing is better for rugged mountain patrols than horses.
The latest issue of Guns Magazine (December 2012) page 33, shows an advertisement for US PALM. In this ad it shows a rugged looking cowboy with three grunts behind him, all on horseback. The Cowboy is the senior trainer for the Arizona Cowboy College.
I had the chance to do a mounted patrol in Arizona, in the mountains above Fort Huachuca.
This patrol didn’t end well for me as the horse put me into a patch of cactus, but that’s beside the point. Horses are still a part of the military and will always be so as long as there are Horses.
My favorite part of Boot Camp was the Bayonet Training… after of course the Rifle Training. I loved the aggressiveness. I loved the Pugil Stick work. We all gathered around a circle, two fighters got in the ring and used pugil sticks to beat the piss out of each other. I was pretty good at it. I defeated a couple guys pretty easily, not because I was so awesome, but they just kinda sucked. Well the DS got this big grin on his face, took off his hat and shirt, and was handed a pugil stick. He told me to give him my best shot. A couple seconds later I had landed one on him. He stopped, took a step back and gave me this sickening smile that I will never forget and continues to haunt my nightmares. .. he then blasted me in an uppercut with the pugil stick so hard that it lifted me off my feet and landed me half out of the ring. I was knocked out for a few seconds.
The DS actually gave me a hand up, dusted me off, asked if I was okay. I said I was fine and that I wanted another round. DS patted me on my back, gave me a complement, and declined kicking my ass again. That night after chow the DS said to me that he was surprised I had actually landed a blow on him as no Recruit had ever done that before. It was barely a tap. He said that had it been a real bayonet, I’d have opened up his jugular and he he would have been dead. I said, yeah, but you would have died after my decapitated head stopped rolling around on the ground. He actually laughed.
In the field I only actually used my bayonet once. And that was to spear my rifle into the ground so I could relieve myself.
The US Marines though, those cats take the bayonet a lot more seriously. Their training is far more intensive.
I would not want the US Military to ever drop the bayonet as a weapon. It’s old school, sure, but can be very effective in the hands of a man that is trained and motivated.

Nice Purse.

Wife and I stopped at SMITH’s the other night. I noticed a guy wearing a “Tactical Bag”. Didn’t think much of it. I watched this guy walk around, purse over his shoulder. He’d talk on his phone, put it back in. Take out a widget, do something with it, then put it back in his purse, while pushing a shopping cart just like all the other women in the store.
This biker dude walks up to the ManPurse Packer and I just happened to be within earshot, as I was selecting bacon and the Purse Man was checking out the Sausages.
“Nice Purse.” The Biker said.
“It’s not a purse!” The Purse Guy said, indignantly. “It’s a Maximum Expedition Tactical Load bearing Assault Recon Bag!”
“Yeah? Well whatever the hell you call it, it’s still a fucking brown purse, bitch.” Then he walked away.
I was trying not to laugh as the Purse Guy just stood there stammering like his whole world was crushed. I picked up the bacon I wanted and walked past him heading out of the damage zone. He looked at me and saw that I was still trying not to laugh.
“It’s not a purse.” He said, defiantly.
I kept walking but said over my shoulder, “None of my business, pal. Whatever makes you feel butch.”
I saw the guy yesterday. He didn’t have the big with him.