Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse

My brother Zack, and my friends Mike, Larry, and Tom were at ConDuit and were all on a panel together about surviving in a world gone Zed.
First point of order… When it comes to winning against Zombies, ignore everything Max Brooks has ever written. If you have to get a book or two to follow, the first book to get is the Boy Scout Handbook. Not a new one, but an old one. Then, if you can, the US Army Ranger Manual. Just to make you feel safer.

Max Brook’s best choice of weapon is the M1 Carbine. I think he saw it in a movie once. Poor ammo capacity, poor power, mediocre accuracy, and almost no ammo availability. Best choice of weapon – the weapon you have the most ammo for that’s bigger than .22LR. Because while you can pack a bazzillion rounds of .22LR, you can’t reliably destroy the Zombie’s Brain. Shooting it and hitting the head is fine and well, but if that bullet didn’t totally destroy the brain, you’ve not done the job. .22’s are just as likely to bounce off the skull.
Wal-Mart. Someone said go to Wal-Mart. Don’t. Have you see “People of Wal-Mart”? It’s a danger zone to say the least. Instead, go to a Sporting Goods Store if you have to go anywhere at all.  While Zombies will be a threat, the biggest threat will be other living people who want to take what you have. The best course of action is to button up for a little while and let things calm down before you set off.

There is a lot of Immanent Domain issues after an Zombie Uprising.  Few survivors, lots of zombies… that means a lot of unclaimed property.  Feel free to make the use of it, as long as no one living already has a claim.  Upgrade your gear as you find it… House, Truck, Guns, etc.  Now, notice I said Truck instead of “Small Convertible Sports Car”.   Trucks are hard to stop, hard for zombies to get at you… in a sports car, you are very easily pulled out and ripped apart.

I think the most important thing to have in a Zombie Apocalypse, are friends who are smart and also prepared.

12 thoughts on “Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse”

  1. I already have a plan to fortify the entrance to my small subdivion….I have to hide the diagrams or my wife my try to have me committed. I also know where my local Chevy dealership keeps the keys to the Silverado’s and there is a Bass Pro shop 15 minutes away.
    The Bass Pro SHop will probably be a “challenge” as I am sure a boatload of folks will run there when the dead walk again…coming up with a plan for that too…(smug grin to myself).

    I dont understand why people consider me odd, even the CDC says to prepare for the ZA…

  2. Given that the brain is a small target and Zombies while often slow don’t move all that smooth for the most part making it harder to get the shot. So I’m wondering would a pelvic girdle shot slow a Zombie down enough to let you get the head shot?

  3. Well being a gear head and a truck driver my second order of business would be to build ‘Dead Reckoning’. First being the obvious basic survival package of supplies and security.

  4. #1 Modify the plow for my single axle Sterling(not as unstoppable but quicker and more maneuverable than my WesternStar) to work as a “cattle guard”.
    #2 Load auxiliary fuel tank into back to prevent unnecessary stops.
    #3 Get the #e!! out of jersey(we got enough zombie sheep here now so the sooner the better).

  5. IF it were cheaper and more availible I always thought the 5.7 would be a good Zombie killer. Alas, it’s for people with a lot more disposable income than me.

    I always hate how armor is written off in Zombie movies/shows. M1 Abrams, meet zombie horde. Squish-squish-squish. “Hey! Where’d all the zombies go?”

  6. Which reminds me about an interview that was done with a Japanese infantry veteran of WW II.
    Question:”What small arm carried by the Americans caused you the most trepidation.
    Answer:” The Thompson Sub Machine gun.
    Question:”That’s surprising it wasn’t issued all that much and was range limited?
    Answer:”After you’ve seen a friend loose half of his skull to one hit from one you get some respect for it.”

      1. Indeed. Quoth my uncle, in his journal from the island-hopping campaign, which I read long after he died (of problems related to the malaria he caught on said campaign):
        “what a weapon”.
        He used it to great effect on point in the jungle.

  7. Phase 1: Immediate survival. This is the point of imminent zombie attack. Your priority is to find a weapon and fight for your life. This is the place for your everyday concealed pistol.

    Phase 2: Short-term survival. Your mission is to find short-term shelter and provisions for a few hours (water, ammo, etc.) towards the goal of getting to your home or other point of safety and resupply. This is the point to get your trunk gun.

    Phase 3: Intermediate survival. At this point, you have reached your home or other permanent shelter. You have access to food, water, weapons, etc. to last for several days. Your goal is to fortify your home against attack and try to get as much information as you can. If possible, organize with other survivors.

    Phase 4: Long-term survival. There are two main possibilities here. Either the gov’t is competent enough to put a stop to the outbreak or they aren’t. In the latter case, the military will most likely be overrun and help is not coming for you. The gov’t will likely decide that sending ground troops in is a losing proposition and that bombing the largest concentrations of infected (i.e., cities) is their best strategy. At that point, you must escape to shelter and resupply in a more isolated area. This is where the bugout gear comes into play. After escaping major population centers, your goal is to meet with other survivors, establish measures for continued survival, and deal with the remnants of the zombie threat.

    Note: In every zombie movie there is also a human enemy in addition to the zombie attackers. Be on the lookout and consider keeping a concealed weapon in order to turn the tables on them.

  8. If you want to talk to people who are serious about preparing for the Zombiepocalypse (or any other “pocalypse” for that matter) then you can find them at There are a lot of military and survivalist types that comment on there. We go over such topics as fitness, weapons choices, what supplies you need and how to store them, and just about anything you can imagine that has to do with disaster preparedness.

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