How to Buy a Gun

Black Friday is tomorrow. A lot of guys want guns. A lot of guys are afraid of their wives, even though they have plenty of money to get the gun they want. I offer you slackjaws some friendly advice on how to get your gun.

24 thoughts on “How to Buy a Gun”

  1. My wife loves me and loves guns. She would much rather I buy guns than Motorcycles, flashlights, knives and lots of other things I spend money on. I am so blessed.

  2. Not to be critical , but the 1st thing that brought to mind was basic training and “This is my weapon, this is my gun. . . . “. As far as new weapons into the homestead, the Wife asked how may I had one time and I just said”enough” and nothing more

  3. she got me a crossbow for Xmas, easier than getting a silencer for something else. I’m not messing with that by being duplicitous.

  4. Here’s an idea. Budget some play money once a month and use that to pay for the layaway. That way, when you walk in the door proudly displaying your new purchase, and your wife starts to go off, you can just say “Budgeted for it with my play money”. Since your WIFE should ALSO be getting a budgeted play money amount, that should also stop her in her tracks.

    So, man up, stop trying to sneak it by your wife, and find a way that works for both of you.

  5. My wife loves me, but doesn’t give a shit if I am happy. Can the gun store employee make the one ticket raffle call to the “alternate” (wife) number on the ticket?


  6. Caryn and I don’t sneak around on purchases, but know way too many people who do… and who seem to have to.
    I will never understand the people who do, and am glad for that.
    Finding the right person for you is one of the basic steps for happiness in life.
    That being said…
    GREAT video!
    One of my favorites.


  7. I had to use, and was an absolute master of, the empty case routine with my ex-wife. She never caught on and mostly because I didn’t make the mistake of playing with it after coming home. It takes great patience and restraint to NOT caress and admire a new purchase and that is the key for that ploy to be most convincing.

    I did notice that your truck shifts an aweful lot…

  8. Another good thing about the layaway approach is that you can go for quality and the full kit. I’ve made the mistake of buying an off brand and then slowly adding bells and whistles onto it. Then when I wanted to trade,it didn’t matter that it was spiffed up, the label still said cut rate and besides condition that counts.
    Also if you’ve got the hunger for an exotic piece and your local dealer doesn’t carry it and is reluctant to order it, you might want to consider why.

  9. When I was collecting and had many dozens of rifles, I always left at least one empty space in the rack, even when building more and more racks. (I had ’em double decked on all four walls of my toy room.) Then one day the inevitable happened. She asked “Why on Earth do you want all those dirty old guns” The term “All those dirty old guns made them an entity of their own. Now one could disappear or another show up without disturbing the size of the entity. Besides, she couldn’t tell a Mosin 91-30 from a ’98 Mauser from a Schmidt-Rubin K31, so she never knew and after a few years didn’t care what or how many. She did think the M1 carbine was “cute” though. So she shoots that one. Funny how some women are, she can’t bear the thought of a sharpshinned hawk taking a field mouse, but gets jumping up and down excited at putting a .30 cal. hole in a live coyote pelt.

    Gerry N.

  10. Buy 2 of the same gun. Then say my friend George said I could have one if I would fix the other for him. This gives you a chance to place an order to replace springs and get extra magazines. Then sell the second gun to fund the next gun purchase.

    Or you could make an “even” trade at the gun show, That old H&R .22 for the S&W stainless .357

    How about trading computer or car repair service in trade for that new gun.

  11. HA! You guys are funny. I figure if you are afraid of your wife, then you need a new wife!

    If I want a gun, I buy it.

    Married 22 years and no problems yet!

  12. George, you rock! I’ve listened to you on AAR since you joined Mark. You’re a cool and funny guy with a great heart. Thanks for that hi-larious gun buying video, plus the many extras offered up after that. Stop me before I spend a couple hours! Keep up the great work and let us know how to support you.

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