Tag Archives: Bacon Show

Negative Gunshow Commentary Feedback

Not everyone agrees with me about needing a new Gun Show Promoter.  Here is a guy that just isn’t getting what I was driving at.  He’s one of the crotchety dealers I must have seen selling overpriced guns that don’t meet a fraction of the value being asked:

It is possible to overdo it. However, sales are better, and shows last longer, if there’s a certain amount of merchandise for spouses and kids. The “All we allow is guns” shows suck dead donkeys, and are run by humorless losers who clearly doubt their masculinity.

My tables are right next to the guy roasting the fresh almonds and fudge. It draws traffic like nobody’s business, and also means more money for the show, not the fairgrounds food concessionaire, who sells better than average but still overpriced crap.

Why should dealers bother sticking to guns when you’re going to bitch just as much about their product? “Waah, waah, they didn’t have what I liked, and some of them don’t share my expertise or taste!” You want the gold nuggets, you have to put up with the moss-covered sandstone. That’s how the game is played.

And if you don’t like beef jerky, you’re just not a man. Not to mention raping a sterling with a wuss-length barrel and an EoTech. Grow up, Mall Ninja.

Here’s a thought: Why don’t you stop going if you don’t like it?

You want to know who’s killing the shows? Look in a mirror.

Really?  So your only real defense regarding all the Junk was that it was bringing more traffic pass your table?  So people were not going to your booth… but just by it so they could get to the snacks.  So, if people are going to the Almonds and Fudge booth – why are you not selling Almonds and Fudge?  Because you obviously don’t think people are going to these things to see GUNS.  Guess what… They are.  That’s the draw.  That is why people are paying the 10 bucks to get in.  To see guns.  Guys want to see cool firearms and have a chance to buy them.  This is why you see mostly guys, and not mothers with kids in tow pushing shopping carts. It’s called a Gun Show for crying out loud.  How thick do you have to be to not get that?  It’s not the Fudge and Almond show.  People paid money to see guns.

You are not getting what I was talking about… Let me use smaller words and I’ll talk slower and louder.  I want the Gun Show to be a Gun Show.  Well, actually, I would like it to be a Consumer Oriented version and not a Dealer Oriented version of the SHOT Show.  Well, you probably don’t know what that even is as they don’t have Crystal Figurines and Indian Princes Fantasy Art.  So let me break it down to you… Shooting… Hunting… Outdoor… Trade.  Basically everything having to do with those key things… Outside shooting and hunting.  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy beef jerky.  I even enjoyed the almonds.  And I got a wonderful Strussel for all the Crusader Guys.  We all agree, it was good.  Not exactly fresh, but it was good.  But that’s not what I went to the gun show for.  Oh, I like good food.  I am surprised that no one has done a BACON Booth.  Candied bacon, BBQ bacon, Spicy bacon… I mean, if you don’t like bacon, you probably prostitute yourself in downtown San Fran working a glory-hole to satisfy that void in your soul for not being a real Gun Show Guy according to your own failed logic.    But that’s not what I am talking about.

I want to see something better than a Junk and Food Show.  I’m talking a real gun show where the draw isn’t the bloody almonds and fudge.  But everything having to do with the Shooting, Hunting, Outdoors trade.   Get it?   Apparently not. That’s because you are entrenched in the stagnant lameness that is a gun show and are offended at the idea of change.  You are afraid that if they don’t have Fudge, no one would go to your dusty old table.  I can understand that.

And you want to talk smack about the Sterling?  Really?  The 16 inch barrel is necessary because that classifies it as a rifle. A simple 9mm Rifle according to the State of Utah and the ATF… so we can have the folding stock and all that goodness with no special paperwork, no six month background processing and no $200 dollar tax stamp for a Class III gun.  (Do you even know what that is, Fudgy?) This allows any Citizen to legally and easily buy a Sterling as easy as it would be to buy your ruined, bubbafied, .303 Enfield for 380 bucks when it’s only worth 25.   The great thing about the Sterling – if you knew anything about it – is that the owner can then, in his own time and pleasure, process that paperwork on his own and then he could drop in an original short Sterling barrel, trigger parts and have a legal real honest to Rat Patrol looking British Sterling.  The Optics Mount, was done per customers request, and can be added or removed just as easy as the barrel.  For anyone clever enough to position his booth near the Fudge, or could field strip a 1911, could add or remove the mounts at whim.  And if you actually fired some guns once in awhile instead of letting them collect dust waiting for some Almond Muncher to glance at it – you would know that shooting and hitting is more effective with a good quality optical gun sight. Some customers have made note of that, and inquired about, and we provided it.  See, we want to give people what they want, not hoping someone is bored enough to look over your wares while waiting for their almonds.

Maybe you should open up a Bacon Booth.  But if you do, I get 20%. But I doubt you could pull it off, because you obviously lack vision and imagination.

(Actually, that’s a damn good idea.  “WORLD OF BACON”.  Hell, maybe I should open up that booth!)