I don’t even know how to process this…  But this happened this morning.

It got cold.  Real cold.  Early in the morning, sun has just crested.  You can see your breath.  Now, I gotta take a leak so I run into this Porta John.  As I start to relieve myself, this evil steam rises up from my stream.   This steam comes up to my face, and I’m trying to get my face away from it… and I’m mid flow so I can’t just disengage.  So I’m trying to pull my head back away from this Piss Mist, but it’s filling the Porta John now.  There’s no escape.  So all I can do is hold my breath until I finish.
Well, I finally finish so I quickly zip up and break out of there.  I bust out the door and take a deep breath.  Filling my lungs with fresh air all the sudden.  Cold air.  Causes me to cough.  I look up, and there’s a dude standing there that had been waiting to use the Porta John himself.
He just looks at me.  “Judas man, if it’s that bad maybe I don’t need to go in there.”

This cracked me up… I was laughing all morning about it.