Differences…

There are differences between Utah and the East Coast.

1.  Pretty Girls Riding Bicycles and Smiling.  If you drive around Emerald Island, or pretty much anywhere along the East Coast that I’ve seen… you will see Pretty Girls riding bicycles.  They are all over the place.  And every one of them is smiling.  At first I thought this was lovely, but the consistency has become disturbing.  There is something Stepford’ish going on here.  I don’t trust it.  I stopped at a Stop Sign waiting for traffic when one of these Stepford Girls rode up and stopped next to me.  She said “Hi” and smiled.  She was gorgeous.  I screamed and drove off in a cloud of tire smoke.

2.  If you buy Grits and the Grocery Store the Cashier doesn’t look at you funny.

3.  They have Grits at the Grocery Store.   The real stuff.  Not Quaker Instant.

4.  BBQ is a Serious thing and it’s not to be taken lightly.  Do not – Do NOT – ask for Ketchup at a BBQ place.  I witnessed this happen to a guy who had New Jersey plates on his car.  The establishment’s Pit Master damn near jumped the counter.  No, I mean he was half way over when other people in the kitchen caught him and dragged him back.  I believe this is where the term “Ruckus” comes from.  The New Jersey Guy was ordered to leave or he’d be thrown on the grill next.  He left.  Very quickly.
Also, going along with this… Don’t be from another region and try to boast that your region’s BBQ is better than the one you are in.  You just eat your BBQ in the manner of the locals and shut your dirty heathen mouth.

5.  People will Abide.  In Utah, people are always in a rush.  No matter where or when, they are always in a rush.  No one just takes a moment to enjoy where they are at.  If there isn’t something going on, their noses are in some Electronic Device.   Here on the Coast, I’m seeing people just kicking back, taking in the awesomeness of their surroundings.  I did this myself.  Just sat on a bench by the docks, and watched the boats and people and the sea birds… You know what?  I could do that every day for the rest of my life.  It’s nice to just… Abide.  Turn off the Cell Phone.  Turn off the MP3 Player… and just be where you are.  People will do that here.  They don’t do that in Utah.