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Farm Boy Hates SUV’s.    

Farm Boy Hates SUV’s.  

Let me state right off-depending on who and where you live, between 90 and 99% of SUV s bought are just plain EL STUPIDO (MUCHO STUPIDO). Most SUV’s are clumsy, awkward and handle like a Rhine River barge. They suck gas like a Hoover on crack.

People who drive them lead a life of self delusional security and generally drive with more reckless abandon than the average driver. The accident and injury statistics testify to that fact.  I've heard it all.  You need the room, haul stuff, 4WD, go wild places, gotta get that deer, etc.

There are better options.  The oil companies and producing countries are all evil, of course.  An employee of Amoco told me during the1st "oil crisis" of the 70's that they were hiding gas in everything but bath  tubs.  We all know the Saudis are the financiers and godfathers of your local Islamic terrorist.  Want to give them more money?  I could go on and discuss Chavez too.  

Let me make suggestions to the brighter in the crowd.  You want to haul?  Get a club cab 4cyl Ford ranger with a stick shift.  4WD, if you must. A Taurus wagon for those that want to haul w/comfort… Used are dirt cheap, new ones are really cheap  because, the dealers are desperate. The CAFE standards help make the 4 cyl pickups cheap.  The Honda CRV w stick will get 25 mpg in daily driving. 

The VW diesel wagon Jetta is probably the sanest vehicle for sale in the USA.  Gets as good or better mileage that those left wing greenie weenie hybrids that no Bush lover should be seen in.

There are some great 4wd wagons from BMW and Volvo.  The Subies with the smaller motors and sticks give decent mpg and driving dynamics.  One thing I have found in talking to people is that ignorance runs rampant thru to body politic.  If the last small car you drove was a 74 Pinto, you will think that leather clad Durango is a heck of an invention. Never will you realize that it has the driving dynamics of a barn going downhill with a mudslide.  Try a Passat 4motion for a revelation. You'll save a few thousand and a tanker of crude every year.  It's built like a Rolex and the interior is so nice you'll never want to go in the house. 

The car makers actually overprice their 'burbs, Exps., etc.  An Explorer should cost about 5 bills more than a Ranger-not 10 g's.  They stopped making decent RWD "normal" cars and foisted off trucks on us. What a rip.

Counter Point, by Traci.

The above article was written by someone, who has little dreams. 

I am an American.  I love big, fast, and powerful.  I am a small person, not quite 5'4" and weigh less than 120lbs.  I do not drive like a crazy person, and have never had an accident.  I find it demeaning that, someone who likes to feel the power of a big beautiful machine, is stupid, or reckless!  I like being able to see where I am going.  When I am in big bad Durango, I can see around the other cars, and for once don't feel intimidated by the traffic.  I like the fact that the Durango has three seats, and can haul people, or cargo comfortably. 

If the need should arise, like bad weather, or mud slides, or what ever, I would have the means to get going.  I don't like putting money in the hands of the Oil Barons, however, there are better ways of taking care of that, besides taking away the one thing I enjoy.  How about boycotting those oil companies who get their oil from the "Bad guys"?  You can get a list of those companies, and just not buy gas from them.  Why take away something we enjoy, because of politics, or economics, when we can accomplish the same thing, by boycott. 

I love the Durango, and all the big SUV's.  I would like to have a big ole Dodge Ram Duelie!  It's American!  I agree, all the afore said vehicles are awesome, for those who want them.  I am sure, I would love them right along with my big ole SUV.  But please don't take away my likes, and wants, and please don't call me stupid, because of what I like!  Thank you very much!  You are starting to sound like a Marxist.

Another Point of View, by Ogre

I have to fall into the Pro-SUV camp, but I can see both sides.  I think the Automotive Industry is seeing this and has responded well..  They are not making new SUV units.  By definition an SUV is a truck that is converted to a passenger carry platform.  What we are seeing now days are what is called a "Cross-Ute" or a Cross-Over-Utility-Vehicle.  These Cross-Utes are not built off truck platforms, but off car platforms.  They are lighter and sportier than a true SUV.  They are more comfortable and tend to prefer to stay in an urban-suburban setting than the rural lifestyle of it's more brutish cousin... but they can play dirty once in awhile if they feel like slumming, but not too much and they would prefer to keep one wheel on some pavement. 

Some of the latest Cross-Ute vehicles are really just glorified Station Wagons or as they say in England "Shooting Brakes".  They have very little in the way of off road clearance and the tires are only mildly larger than standard.  I have to admit that some of these new Cross-Utes are really quite attractive vehicles.  I'm loving them.  They can drive cross country or across the country in comfort, with speed and style. 

Now, I love a performance car.  These new rigs are coming out with more and more agility and speed... and of course an overabundance of power.  Cooper-Mini-like handling is fine... but that is not the font of all performance.  I like good handling... but I also like eyelid peeling acceleration. 

I like being able to "Super Cruise"... Why?  Because of places like fucking Kansas, Okay?  I don't want to spend one second longer in Kansas than I absolutely have to.   I don't give a nut if I have to drop an extra 3 bucks at the pump to top her off again... I just want out of Kansas.  Have you ever driven across that place?  There I signs celebrating all these astronauts from Kansas.  Why do they have so many rocket jocks from Kansas?  I'll tell you why... Because these cats wanted to get as far away from that place as they could possibly get and you can't get any farther away than space, baby!  Everyone else is jealous, not because they went into space... but because they escaped Kansas!   Hence the signs. 

There are actually places in Kansas where you read a sign that says 50 miles to the next town.  You drive for 10 minutes and the next sign says that town is now 62 miles away.  WTF?  Do you know why that is?  Its because Kansas has it's own gravitational field and you didn't reach escape velocity so Kansas is sucking you back in! 

But I digress.  Where was I?  Oh yeah... getting the hell out of Kansas. 

One good way out is in the new Porsche Cayenne.  It's an SUV that comes stock with 450 horses and a top speed of 160 miles per hour.  Hey, If I can't ride a Saturn V booster outta Kansas, I'll take a Cayenne.  They don't call them "Fly Over States" for nothing.  Judas Priest!  

There is also the practical matter of an SUV.  Let's forget about the joys of camping and off roading... because the Ogre Clan likes to do that... but let's keep it day to day here for a second.  I have 5 sons.  5!  Me and the wife make 7 people.  They don't make cars that seat 7.  And screw Mini-Vans!  I hate mini-vans!  Now until the Durango, the only other high capacity vehicle option was a damn Chevy Suburban.  That thing is a BUS.  I don't need that much truck for 5 little boys.  But if I wanted to be "Legal" and put everyone in seatbelt... then that was it.   This is where the big Earth-Killer SUV becomes "JUST RIGHT". 

A station wagon Jetta?  Please, Baby... You can't escape Kansas' gravitational pull in one of those!

 

 


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