Dec 31st:  New Year's Eve: HAPPY NEW YEAR!   Last post of 2003:  

I caught a little bit of a stage act where Presidential Hopeful and Failed Military Leader Wesley Clark stood amidst a room full of some of the dimmest bulbs ever assembled outside of Capital Hill and answered “questions”.  I put quotation marks around the word “questions” because they were not real questions but queue card prompts Clark in different directions.  Cute act.   You would have to be stupid by even Liberal standards to believe a word Clark said.   He said that Bush has put the blame for 9-11 on middle level CIA and FBI officers, and that it was all George Bush’s fault because he could have done more.  Of course Clark made no indication as to what he could have done… Of course Clark made no mention of all the times Clinton could have had Osama and let him go… Of course Clark made no mention that the President could take no action if no actionable intelligence floated up from the mid-level functionaries in the CIA and FBI…  But it’s all Bush’s fault.  Right.  Then Clark says that he personally would have had Osama Bin Laden by now and it’s Bush’s fault that we don’t have him.  Right.  What a gigantic ASS to say such completely unfounded statements like this.   Oh, but Clark gets even BETTER.  Check this out.   Had I not seen him say this, I wouldn’t have believed it… He said that only he could be the next commander and chief because he has already been a commander and chief and only he could hold the respect of the international community because they know him already.    You would have to know Clark’s background to understand the unmitigated steaming pile of bullshit that that is… Yes, Clark was a General and commanded the European theater… uh huh… granted.  But Clark was also tossed out on his ear because he was a corrupt fucknozzle and everyone in Europe knows him to be corrupt… not just corrupt, but can be bought off cheap.  He has photos of himself trading hats with some of the most vile cockholsters on the planet.   Let’s see, Mr. Clark, the documentation explaining the reason for your dismissal from Europe.  Let’s see your record.  Before you start making such claims, jackass, please tell us all why you got shit-canned, and why your records are practically a state secret.   I don’t think you would have caught Bin Laden by now… You can’t prove you could have… and to make it a point, Mr. Clark, the point of the whole operation wasn’t focused on just one man.  Asshole.  It was about destroying Bin Laden’s organization.  That was accomplished.  Screw Bin Laden.  Getting him will be nice once we do – but it’s nothing important right now.  We trashed the terror groups ability to organize anything large scale.  And that is a fact.  The biggest thing they have been able to do is to put a bomb in a truck and roll it at an unsuspecting hotel target.  Nice.   Oooooh I’m scared!     Clark is one creepy Skellator looking motherfucker… you can’t trust him… you can’t believe him… and given the chance, he would give the entire control of the US Military over to the UN while at the same time, giving the UN the West Wing of the Whitehouse.  Hell, Clark is probably the perfect Clinton Democratic Candidate!   You know, I would rather see Howard Dean with 2 terms in Office than to see Clark with one single minute.  Do I hate Clark?  Hate is a powerful word… Hate is more than just a bitter resentment or strong dislike… but yeah… I hate Clark.   Fuck Clark. 

Noon: New Years Resolutions:  To carry out all Last Year’s Resolutions… once I remember what the hell those were…  No really. 

SWAT Magazine.  The March 2004 issue arrived yesterday.  I don’t get how magazines do this issue stuff… March.  In December.   Okay.    I’m cool with it… mainly because SWAT magazine is the best gun magazine available right now.  Period.  Especially since Rich took over as publisher and had pushed some very well done changes.  I read another magazine that featured a glowing and glossy report of a handgun that has been proven to be a total piece of shit.  You are not going to see that kind of article in SWAT.  If you don’t get SWAT, you should.  Seriously.  I’m not kidding.  Get it.  It’s the best there is.  The articles on tactics, training, all of it roll up together into a magazine unlike the others… Just look at the cats that write for SWAT.  If SWAT could just get some wheelgun articles from John Taffin, it would be PERFECT.

This Issue of SWAT starts out with the message from the Editor, Denny Hansen.  Denny is a great guy and fun to hang out with if you get the chance… he touches on a subject in this issue that could very well take up an entire issue of the magazine.  He mentions the shooting video that involved a gunman attacking a lawyer right outside the court house.  (funny how such events don’t happen more frequently) Denny says that “It may have been a wiser choice at such close range to counter attack – violently”.  Denny is exactly right.  Nail on the head.  Getting shot doesn’t mean the fight is over.  Far from.  It means that the fight is on!  It means that you just heard the opening bell for the fight for your life.   I know this… most of Mad Ogre Readers know this… but it is not universal knowledge.  The lawyer is reported to have made the typical “I couldn’t believe it was happening” statement.  That’s nice.  This lawyer is extremely lucky that the gunman was armed with a .22 and was a pathetic shot.  Horde Members, as Denny says, mindset is critical.  It’s the Mindset that is the difference between the Quick and the Dead.  You could be unarmed in a violent encounter and still win if you have the mindset for it.  You could also be well armed and still loose if you don’t have the mindset.     This mindset is something that is hard to teach… because it’s all up to the individual.  It’s in your soul.  It’s the canvas that your character is painted on.   You can change it… strengthen it.  Or lose it.  Are you a winner or a looser?  Are you a Man or a Mouse?  Are you the Victor or the Victim?   If you don’t have the proper mindset, you might as well not carry a gun at all.  Don’t bother, because it wont help you.  And if you are a Police Officer or other Professional Gunslinger... and you don’t have the mindset…   Please… Quit your job and apply someplace less confrontational… like a flower shop or Arts and Crafts store or something.   

On page 25 of this issue is a really neat little .22 package.  A Walther P22 with a Gemtech suppressor.  Very slick.  I love it.  I just really wish Walther didn’t shrink the P99 so much to make the P22… If it wasn’t so small as to make it actually difficult for me and other guys with big hands to shoot well – it would have ranked high in my top 5 .22 pistol list.  Especially with a suppresser.  This little .22 caliber Gemtech is really slick too.  40 dB sound reduction and it weights only 3 ounces… and it’s only $299.  Wait a second.  “Only 299”?  *sigh*  There was a time when you could buy a suppressor for your gun… rifle or pistol .22 to .50 caliber for only 5 bucks at your local hardware store.  Now, thanks to wonderful federal law, suppressors are considered exotic.  This is retarded.  Do you consider your car’s muffler to be an exotic device?  No?  That’s what a suppressor is.  In a nutshell, a suppressor is just a muffler for your gun.   If you understand the science behind the muffler, you understand the science behind the suppressor.  Granted, these suppressors have been getting better and better in the last 20 years but that is thanks to a greater demand for quality and improvements to material science and audio sensing equipment etc… but it’s still a simple device.  The only downside to a “Can” is heat and can’s ability to deal with heat.   I have a suppressor design that overcomes the heat problem and it’s designed to use with sustained fire weapons such as machine gun and SMGs… but would be sweet for your varmint rifle that you use for thinning out problem Prairie Dog Towns.   It doesn’t’ just deal with heat better than every suppressor on the market so far, but it also changes the sound of the shot better than other suppressors as well… And that is a critical factor for a suppressor as well.  I showed this design to a machinist that actually used to make suppressors and he was very impressed with my concept.  In fact, his one word summation of it was “Brilliant”.  He said that if had that concept back when he was still making them, he would still be in business.   Maybe I should send it to Gemtech?  Hmmm… Maybe I should look into getting these produced under my own name… “Ogre Suppression Science” or “OSS” for short.  But is jumping through the ATF hoops really worth it?  That and I have zero venture capital funds.  Oh well.  Just chalk it up to all my other ideas I don’t have money to make happen.

Surprisingly good Gun Flick:  LXG.  Watched that movie last night for the first time.  I'm loving the long double rifle capable of off hand 900 yard bullseyes... especially since you don't even have to really aim it.  The high capacity double action Single Action Army Colts. I gotta get me a pair of those.  The Winchesters rocked too... love them. But I think my favorite were the AK-47's the badguys used. You might have missed those... they were the once wearing the metal "Maxim" boxes.  Still... fun move. Groovy submarine and car.  Quartermane... Didn't Mr. Thornbirds play that roll in a different movie?   Anyways… this flick had a lot of potential and only a slight part was actually realized.  This happens as lot when Comic Books are made into Movies.  Comic Books and Video Games becoming a movie… Can we stop greenlighting these projects and start filming more good books?  Take a look at LOTR.  Take a look at Harry Potter.   If done right, these books become fantastic movies.  Granted if you are a dumbass movie maker and decide to rewrite the book for the movie, then you loose everything and your movie is automatically shit regardless of how much work you do on the movie… take a look at Battlefield Earth… take a look at Starship Troopers… those were two of my favorite sci-fi books when I was a kid.  Now I am almost embarrassed to mention them because the movies were so unbelievably bad.  Two high school kids with a Hi-8 camera could have done better in the back yard with legos and action figures.   Still… Given some relative success with LOTR and Potter… I am going to suggest another couple of books l’d like to see made into movies:  EON, RINGWORLD, VIRTUAL LIGHT, ENDER’S GAME, CALL OF CTHULHU, THE STAINLESS STEEL RAT, ON A PALE HORSE, I JEDI… these are just to name a few.   Some would be very complicated… such as the Call of Cthulhu… which would have to be done very carefully and take in some other Cthulhu works by Lovecraft, such as Mountains of Madness… but it can be done and it can be done well if you have a serious director working it with the intent of staying true to the original works.  Eon, Ringworld and On a Pale Horse would be EPIC films…

Dec 30 Tuesday:  Noon: MadOgre.com is growing more and more every day.  More and more readers all the time.  Gets kind of scary sometimes.  For example, I have more new readers world wide in one day than books my Liberal sister sold all together.  I got Seasons Greetings from every continent on the globe and from every country in the coalition of the willing.  None from France though... Go figure.  Let me just say thanks to all who browse around and read MadOgre.com from time to time and for those frequent readers who are of The Horde.   I'm not going to do any Year in Review bullshit... If you want that, read the archives.  But I am going to wish everyone a better year ahead than the year behind.   Peace Through Superior Firepower!     

I was looking at a catalog of handguns last night, and I was considering what I wanted in a .22.  I am impressed at the broad selection available and the variations.    There are so many out there now that picking one is no simple task.   After some thought on the matter I am making a list of my “Top 10 .22’s”.  I am taking 5 autos and 5 revolvers.  But before I get to the list, let me ponder for a moment some matters… I found myself wishing for some reason that H&K made a .22, but it seems they are too busy playing Super Soldier to be bothered with such simple pursuits.  Just as well, no one wants to pay $800 for a .22 with a crappy trigger.  (Oops!  Did I just bust on HK?)  Another missing item is a .22 from CZ.  Not the Kadet kit for the 75, but the CZ-122 that I have posted about earlier. (Look at the picture of the gun down the page)  That is a gun that CZ is making, but not importing.    Beretta has a new .22 out called the NEOS.  While it’s a good looking pistol both the quality and the support for these guns are lacking.  If you get one and it doesn’t shoot right, Beretta is basically saying it’s your own tough luck.  Unless you find one that is working right and printing good shot groups – avoid the NEOS.  This is okay, because that the top of my list is another .22 from Beretta that is truly excellent.  It is based on the Cheetah platform and shoots as good as it looks.  Better actually.  Let’s hit the list:

Autoloaders:

#1.  Beretta 87 Target.

#2.  SIG Trailside.

#3.  Browning Buckmark.

#4.  S&W 22 Sport.  5.5 inch barrel.

#5.  Taurus 922.

Revolvers:

#1.  S&W 617.  6 inch barrel.

#2.  Taurus Tracker .22LR.  6 inch barrel.

#3.  S&W Airlight 317.

#4.  NAA Black Widow.  4 inch barrel.

#5.  Ruger SP101.  4 inch barrel.

As you can tell, I prefer the longer barrels on .22 pistols.  I consider a .22 a target and small game pistol and both ventures benefit from the longer sight radius that the longer barrels give you.    Meaning it’s easier to make your bullseye shot and fill the camp’s pot with a longer barrel.   Bigger calibers do not require the precision required of .22 to make a clean kill.   Especially when it comes to cats, cause you don’t want to wound it and have it running back home to upset the owners.  You gotta plant it with one hit so you can bury it or feed it to your dog or something.

Chris Muir nailed Howard Dean to Dean’s own cross.  Go check it out. He does this often, but these two are just classic.

I am about done playing Grand Theft Auto III, and for some reason this Dell refuses to play Vice City.  When the warranty runs out I’ll drop in my TI4600 graphics card and it will play just fine then… but for now, I’m fine… I can wait.  Just as well, GTAVC is pretty much the same thing as GTA3 and I’m tired of it anyways.  I’m looking for Undying again.  I loaned it to someone but forgot who.  That was a great game.  Scary, fun, interesting, cool story… I’d also like some Operation Flashpoint with some new missions.  Stealing an MI-24 and razing Russians is a lot of fun. 

*Puts head to keyboard*  Man, I hate this little town.  4 hours from civilization and my car sucks gas like Liberal sucks tax dollars.  Any time I drive to Salt Lake, it costs me about 45 bucks.  Still, I’m planning on running out there as soon as I can.  Trade a gun and eat some real food and hang out with some friends.   Correia, Steve (who is coming back to SLC), Carl, Eric, maybe even Matt if he isn’t too busy…   I’d like to hit Durangos for those monster chicken burritos or El Azteca for that mountain of nachos they make.   Real people, real food.  *sigh*  This little town has a new Chinese buffet joint, and I hear it’s pretty good.  I’ll have to check it out… but if you don’t have any friends what’s the point of hanging out there?  Man, I hate this little town.  I don’t fit in here.  I never have.  I don’t talk “Country” and I don’t know who used to live in whos house 10 years ago, and I don’t smell like a horse even after a shower.   Fuck this town.  As soon as I graduate, we are out of here.  I know where I want to move to… It’s in Utah still… happy valley where they have new homes cheap… I want one with my back yard to a mountain and no neighbors within sight so I can shoot off my back porch.   If you live in a big city near a coast, you don’t have this luxury of being able to live near town and still live out in the boondocks at the same time.  It’s heaven.   Best of both worlds.  Unfortunately right now I’m in the boondocks out in the middle of nowhere.   At least I have DSL.  If it wasn’t for that I’d be feeling like Gilligan.

Email from reader:  “Hi, I just bought an XD9 and was wondering what you have to do to modify Beretta mags to work in it? – Kent” Hey Kent, thanks for the email.  It's pretty easy really... Find some Beretta mags that your willing to attempt surgery on and set it side by side to the XD mag.  Measure twice and cut once to put the latch on the front of the Beretta mag in the same place as on the XD.  I used a small drill to get the cut started and a Dremel to finish it and round the burrs off.  Use a file to clean the inside of the mag body, and then some steel wool.   Better yet, just get an XD .40 mag.  It will hold more 9MM and you wont risk a good mag for another gun.

Reading a book by Orson Scott Card.  A christmas gift from my wife.  It's about writing.  My young brother is actually taking a class from Card.  Lucky bastard.  I'd give my left nut to take a writing class from Card out there at SVU, perhaps one of the most gorgeous little universities I have ever seen.   *sigh*

Dec 29th, Monday: 1930 I think I found the .22 pistol that I want.  It’s a CZ-122.  Unfortunately this sexy little beast is not being imported into the USA. Isn’t that how it always is?  It’s what you can’t have that you want the most.   Damn.  Okay, actually it’s not that little.  It’s actually pretty big, especially for a .22 rimfire.  But that just makes it all the sweeter of a shooter.  That looks like one hell of a sweet little gun.  Damn you ATF!     

1900:  Glock pistols.  I’ve had some emails asking about my opinion of them because I have only rarely and not recently mentioned them.  Here is my take on them.  They look good and are easy to shoot.  They are very popular with police shooters and civilian shooters alike.  I had a Glock 17 at one point and considered it to be a fine gun, but nothing to get emotional about.  It didn’t inspire any romantic feelings one way or another.  Lots of Horde Members^TM probably own a Glock or two or have owned them in the past.   However I don’t think I would ever buy a Glock again… especially not in any caliber greater than 9MM.  Glock turned me off when they changed the grip design to include finger grooves, and since then they are having a bunch of “KB” issues.  KB means “KaBoom” as in the gun kabooms instead of shooting.   I’m not going to go into this, as Dean Speir has done a lot of work documenting a number of these cases.  I have no interest in having a Glock KB in my hand, as I have witnessed 2 such events personally, with one of them causing what I’ll just call “Severe Trauma” to the shooters hand.  If you want a Glock, there are better options.  The Steyr M series, the Springfield XD series, HK USP series, even the S&W and Walther 99’s are all better options for plastic pistols.  But really, why must you have a plastic pistol?  There is really no reason to insist upon plastic.  It really affords you no great advantages.  Personally I prefer an all steel pistol as the heft makes the pistol all the better handling when your firing it – and forgive me if I am wrong, but it’s the firing part that is the most important aspect considering that it’s the whole point of the device in the first place.

While I am linking to Dean’s Gun Zone article I discovered that I have not made any links to his site, “The Gun Zone”.  It’s a good site, with interesting articles and it’s well worth the read.  Book mark it, add it to your favorites… download it to your PDA… but read through it if you have not read it before.

Email from Horde Member: “Hey Ogre, hadn't written in awhile. Just saw some of your latest posts...  I have a Saiga 12. 1. You can't get anything larger than a 5-rd clip, thanks to the AWB. All in all decent gun. 22" barrel on mine, full choke. I do have a couple of complaints. One is the clip, (duh). Hopefully they import some of those 7-rd clips when (if) the AWB sunsets. 2. The other is you have to pull the bolt back, drop the old clip, and insert another clip while the bolt is pulled back. Other than that great gun. And it usually alternates with my Mossberg 590 (8-shot) on who is on active duty for "homeland defense".   I also bought an AR-180B for my Dad last spring. This is my "thumb up".  I wanted to get something for him a little more accurate than the Ruger Mini-14, but just as reliable. Sweet shooter. AK style blow-back system. We got 2-3" groups at 80 yds standing, slow-medium iron sight aimed fire. BUT we did have some problems when we first got it. I took a couple hundred rounds with me when I went back to my parent's place. Most of it was SP or HP. We were consistently getting jams every four or five shots. I told him to shoot it some more with FMJ. He later informed me that did the trick. We put it through the rigmarole, he said he had run about 500 rds through no jams. The feed ramps aren't finished very well, so you can either take a dremel to them or do a break in of 500-1000 rounds. The only real downside I see to these rifles is the barrel is not chrome lined, and there aren't many accessories right now. May never be. My Dad almost never cleans his guns out except for running a patch through the bore, so after about year or so he should have about 5000 rounds on the AR-180. I'll keep stats and see how dirty it is at the 5000 mark. But anyway after break-in we popped the rifle open after those first 250 rounds (Some of this was total garbage ammo, Wolf, Brown Bear, etc)  It didn't need cleaning. Just run a couple patches through the bore. All done. Unlike my AR, that receives a vehement cursing every time I clean it.  And speaking of AR's. I think I've told you I have a Rock River before. Well, I haven't had many jams. And I have purposely abused the guy to see just how bad it is. I get maybe 1-3 jams after a 1000 rounds or so. And that's if I haven't cleaned it. So, yeah it happens, any AR guy who claims otherwise is a blathering idiot. Though I do believe they have worked out some of the feed and fire problems associated with the platform. Just as long as you clean them every fifteen minutes, you should never have a jam. Okay, I exaggerated, more like clean them every 20 minutes. So why do I own one? Duh, I'm shallow...  Anyway I looked into your post from a month or so ago. The 6.8mm SPC vs. .300 Whisper deal?  I found out Olympic Arms sells other caliber barrels. I am planning on putting together an upper. Oly quoted $573 for an upper built by them. Not including adjustable gas block (another $70 from elsewhere) So I think I'm gonna get it in .300  to complete my Ameri-Euro Trash Yuppie Gun Platform before looking at some of the other rifles out there. Any takes on some new/old Assault Rifle or Main Battle Rifles I haven't seen that might pique my interest?   (BTW: Have you seen .458 SOCOM? 300 grain slugs at 2100 FPS, and 500 grain slugs at 1350+/-  Some people are freaking insane!!)  - Byron” 

Good to hear from you Byron.  As for other rifles, that you may have not seen, Try hunting around for a sexy Italian AR-70.   But be careful, it will be love at first sight.   I’ve seen the .458 SOCOM and it is sick.  Now if I could just get an M96 (another rifle you need to look at closely) chambered in that caliber – I’d be set.   I’d call it “Thumper” and would be able to live happily content with the knowledge that should Big Foot decides to try a forced entry into my house – I would be safe.  Don’t put too much stock into chrome lined barrels my friend.  After a number of rounds (between 500 and 2000 depending on the quality) there is little chrome left anyways.

You want to know how to waste a lot of time?  Take your gun budget max amount and plug that into auctionarms.com search engine and pull up every gun you can afford.   For this I plugged in the amount offered for my S&W 66 and came up with 600 possibilities for just semi-auto pistols alone.  Wow!   Everything for single shot .22 pistols to AK-47s!  That is nuts!  There is a downside, that’s called “Transfers”.  My local FFL here charges 60 bucks to transfer a gun… as a result – I don’t want anything “on paper”.  There is just too much hassle and too much money.  Private sales between two people are still kosher around here, so I think I’m going to stay out of the whole interweb shopping thing.   Right now that it.

100Hrs:  Unable to sleep – able to post.  Why can’t I sleep?  Images in my head of Hillary winning in 2008 shocks me awake every time I start to drift off to sleep.  Such nightmares I wish upon no one.  Speaking of nightmares… Howard Dean has been in my mind this evening… But first, let me preface the subject.

I saw a dead Jack Rabbit yesterday.  It’s George W Bush’s fault!  This has nothing to do with the fact that I launched a 158 grain Semi Jacketed Hollow Point .357 Magnum slug at it and hit it in the ass… This wouldn’t have happened if Bush had Federal Protection of all Jack Rabbits in Uintah County Utah!  Would SOMEONE please thing of the Jack Rabbits! 

Wait a second… I’m sounding ALMOST as stupid as Howard Dean is for ripping Bush one last time… this time on the national food supply.   This is getting stupid… If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, is it Bush’s fault?  People, PLEASE! 

The National Food Supply is FICTION.  There is NO SUCH THING.  We have a nation wide system of food growth and distribution thanks to private enterprise… but to call it a National Food Supply is to make it sound likes it’s a Federal program.   Let me make this very clear… it’s not a federal program and Bush has ZERO… let me say that again… ZERO control over it.  There are a couple things such as the FDA that monitors the standards of cleanliness and what not – but they don’t have any control over the businesses.  If someone is a filthy bastard and runs a filthy shop, then they can shut that shop down but this is hardly what I would call Federal Control. 

You see, Dean is blasting the President for two reasons… #1, is that he has to because he is a vinegar swilling pussy and #2, it’s the Democrats goal to turn America into a Communist State.  Pushing “National Food Supply” is a way to change the public thinking on it and this sway public opinion to communist thinking.   Communism has not worked successfully on Planet Earth – ever.  But hey, let’s try it ONE MORE TIME, shall we?  I think not.   Fuck Howard Dean, and Fuck The Democrats.

Having run out of things to rip Bush about, it’s looking like Dean is turning on his own party now.  (According to the Drudge Report headline) *Heating up some Popcorn* This should be entertaining.  It is very possible that Dean could push some people’s buttons and piss the DNC off to the point they kick him out of the party.  I wouldn’t be surprised to see that.  They have removed the names of people who cross them from the Democrat official roster…. Even an elected Senator.  If this happens and Dean is booted, it is possible that Dean could run as a Green Party candidate, and then it will be Dean & maybe Kerry or Clark as the Democrat candidate against Bush.  Dean splitting that vote in half means a clear and almost uncontested victory by Bush.  

If the Liberal’s big plan to win more support is to keep leaning further and further to the left – why are the Conservatives moving closer to the Center?  Especially when it is perfectly crystal clear that this plan isn’t working for the Left.  I don’t get it.  As a Party, I think the Republicans should take a nice broad step back to the Right and solidify it’s base of support.  This includes full support of the Second Amendment and for the love of Pete – doing something about this campaign reform that has put a strangle hold on the First Amendment!  Moving as far Left as 1980’s Democrats is not going to win over Democrat voters.  There is no appeasement possible here.  There is no appeasement for North Korea, for Osama’s Wrecking Crew, nor is there any appeasement for mononeuronic (I just made that word up) Liberals who can only sing one song at a time… and right now that song is “I hate Bush”.  Take a look at the Democratic Underground.  You think you can reason with those people?  You think you can even have a useful and productive conversation with them?  You can’t!  They don’t even want to have that discussion!  Am I a liar?  Really?  Then how come they ban anyone who questions them?  If you don’t sing with the choir there, your booted out.  That’s the way it is with the Left.  They don’t want to debate because they are not capable of real and honest fact based debate.  They are really good and blame hopping, name calling, useless rhetoric repetition, smoke screening, and all other manners of bullshitting… but honest and intellectual discussion is simply beyond them.  I think the best movie quote is from Tombstone.  “They’re bugs… you can’t reason with bugs.”  That about covers it.

Email from a new reader that has graduated swiftly into the ranks of The Horde:  “Hey, Just wanted to say the site is awesome and you will definitely be getting a contribution from me to keep the site up and running.  See ya - Larry from CT”  Welcome aboard, Larry.   Emails like that make my day, contributions or not.  Contributions make my day as well, emails or not.  I spend about 60 bucks a month for MadOgre.com on hosting and the DSL connection so I can update it.  Some guys do it cheaper with slow connections and on free servers… I like to be able to update whenever the hell I want and not take much time doing it.  I also like absolute and total control over my site and email accounts.  Keeping it all Ogre, all the time is important to me.  Original Ogre, accept no substitute.  Even small contributions such as the occasional T-shit order through Café Press helps out and such funds go directly to MadOgre.com expenses… even though they never add up to enough to pay for it all… but every bit helps.  So of course every month I have to go shoot a cat as punishment to the world like I have said at the bottom of this page ever since I can remember.   Such is life. 

If you want something funny to read, check out Dong Resin’s Joint. It is linked to the left over there.  I read his site today and laughed out loud.  That guy is bent… funny, but bent.   

Dec 28th, Sunday:  1630hrs: The other day I got an email from a Horde Member in Italy.  He questioned a guess I had made in my Guns of Equilibrium article about that movie being the first movie a G-36 rifle had been filmed in.   Off the cuff, I thought it was.  He suggested the first Tomb Raider movie, and looking at production dates, Tomb Raider does indeed beat Equilibrium.  However even Tomb Raider isn’t the first either.  Another email from our man in Italy: “I’ve done a more accurate (frame by frame on some movies that comes after the production stage of the g36) so the true first movie that have a g36 is "resident evil", exactly a full sized g36 plus a ag36 grenade launcher (visible only for an instant during the infiltration scene and mismatched for a mp5 by the uber ai).”

This has made me very curious as to what movie is the very first movie that shows a G36 rifle.  I think I am going to put this question to the largest group of gun nuts that I know, TheHighRoad.org.  If you have ANY gun question – search it out there – or also THR’s Daddy, TheFiringLine.com.  TFL as it is affectionately called is closed to posting, but it still has about 4 years of the best firearms discussion still archived for public viewing.  These two sources are perhaps the finest on the planet.  Let’s see what we come up with.  I’m thinking it might actually be a James Bond or something.  I’m just worried it might be some really pathetic flick like Ghosts of Mars or something.   Crossing fingers…

Mars… speaking of Mars.  The other day I made a critical post regarding the futility of the space program.   I have had emails from some Trekkers that while sketchy at best still failed to offer any justification for the space program.   Look, we discovered there are no threatening green men on Mars or secret alien bases on the dark side of the moon.  *WHEW!* We can all rest easy now and go about our lives.   We know how to toss a satellite into orbit with regularity – good enough!  It’s time to kill NASA!  And do you know why I say kill NASA?  Because more than anything else – It’s NASA that is holding up any and all actually space exploration and discovery.   I mean come on – My Jeep Cherokee is in better shape than any of NASA’s Space Shuttles… On was taken out by a chunk of foam for crying out loud… yet NASA is STILL looking at all the small pieces to “Find out what went wrong.”   I’ll tell you what’s wrong, and save NASA all the millions of dollars.  Three words:  “Old And Busted”.   I like Japanese cartoon space programs… Take an F-14 Tomcat, shove a rocket between it’s engines and blast it out into space.  I hate to say it – but that might actually work.  Not with an F-14 – but perhaps an F-22 or F-111 maybe.  The SR-71 flew at the edge of space all the time… That’s why the pilots wore space suits.   If your already up there doing that… why not strap on a solid fuel booster and go all the way?  Small reaction jet thrusters on the nose and in the wings for control and there you go.  A cheap and reusable spacecraft.  Not only that, but they are already capable of launching weapons… because you never know… We might have missed that secret moon base… Could have been camouflaged or something.

I have been reflecting upon my shooting session yesterday.  Shooting the .44 was perhaps the most enjoyable big bore shooting I’ve done in ages.  No crushing recoil, no flash of lightning, no stress.  I just wish I had about 100 more rounds if it… unfortunately .44 Special is rare around here, and when found, it’s expensive. That’s why I’m wanting a .22… so I can enjoy all the shooting I want for only 10 bucks for 500 rounds.   I think a lot of folks out there who call themselves shooters have totally forgotten about the lowly .22 Long Rifle cartridge.  Let me tell you, I keep my Remington 514 close at hand with my box of quiet .22LR CB at the ready.  Not that I have anything against the songbirds that sit on the fence 50 yards out my back door – it’s just that it makes for such a pleasant little shooting session…. And any wounded bird never goes to waste either.  They are set upon by cats almost as fast as they hit the ground… so I consider it “Feeding Time” and all for the greater good.  Makes me want a suppressed .22 pistol so I can load it up with those awesome Aquila SSS rounds and still be “less noisy”… because CB rounds are quiet, but they are also very weak… and I may suffer from too much temptation and nail the cats from next door and if I do – I want it to be a clean kill.  I’m a very humane ogre.

G-36 Rifle Movie Update… It’s looking like the first movie that the G-36 rifle appeared in was a James Bond flick, “The World is not Enough”.  Still searching this out.

I've been asked if the picture of Monica wearing a MadOgre.com T-shirt is real.   Sadly, no... It is not.  It is a Photoshop.  I have blatantly attempted to use sex to sell Ogre Swag.  I feel so ashamed.   I'm going to have to turn down the marketing job offers now.  The Angelina picture?  Not real either.  I feel so dirty... but in a good way.  For that reason I am linking that image to the full sized image... It makes a good wallpaper.  It's over on the right hand side...

Dec 27th, Saturday, 1700HRS:  Happiness can be said to be a warm gun.  Today that was proven to be true.  I had 50 rounds of .357 Magnum  and 2o rounds of .44 Special that were calling to me, begging to be fired.  I was going to invite my father in law and my sister-in-law’s husband to roll out with me to go shooting, but they were out shopping for frilly nappies or something.  So I decided to hit the foothills solo.  This is fine for me – means more ammo for me since I don’t have to share.  So 3 minutes later I was out in the desert and popping off some shots.   I have found that I enjoy shooting the .44 Special much more than the .357… Even if the .357 has a much better trigger… but due to the .44 Special ammo’s expense, I just don’t get to shoot it nearly as much.   And I like shooting.   Anyways, I was thinking about selling or trading the .357 Magnum (a stainless model 66 S&W) for a nice .22 automatic.  I would love a Browning Buckmark so that is what I am going to hunt for.  Oh, speaking of hunting, I nailed a jackrabbit at about 45 yards with the .357.  It was a total luck shot as the Jack was running it’s arse off… and that’s where I hit it.  The JHP exited the chest leaving a very messy and ragged hole indicating that the bullet expanded nicely.  Total Luck Shot.  There is a Golden Eagle that lives in the area that I have seen several times.  Perhaps it will find the rabbit before the crows do.  I’d like to think that anyway.  Where was I?  Ah, looking for a Browning Buckmark… Yes, that’s the goal.  I like Buckmarks for a number of reasons, mainly for the fact that they feel like really high quality guns while many other .22's on the market feel like toys.  There is another gun I am very interested in and would jump at the chance to get one.  It’s from Taurus.  The new 922.  It’s an interesting looking pistol with a nice long target barrel and grip that is conductive to bullseye shooting.    I’ve never seen one in person before so I am not even sure if they are yet available.  If not, Buckmark it is. 

Email from Reader:  “I found a link to your Guns of Ronin article on the 1911 forum, read that, then Guns of the Matrix both of which I enjoyed.  Then I found your M-16 article.  I spent 12 years in the Marines (Rifleman, Scout-Sniper, Sensor Operator, Intelligence Specialist) with the M16A1 and A2 and could not agree more with your very well written article.  A rifle that fires by dumping all it's pollutants back into itself never made sense to me.  Recently I bought an Armalite AR-180B which is an excellent rifle.  -Terry”

Thanks for the email, Terry.  The AR-180B is an excellent choice.  Unlike the AR-15, the AR-18’s action was used as the basis for development of several other rifles, such as the HK G-36.  So indeed, it is a very good choice.  And much less spendy than an AR-15 too.

Email from Horde Captain Robert: “This pissed me off in so many ways.  "But Franks’ scenario goes much further. He is the first high-ranking official to openly speculate that the Constitution could be scrapped in favor of a military form of government."  BAH! I don't know if I could keep from swinging somebody who actually had the audacity to threaten my beloved country like that so easily! HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HE SPEAKS OF! WHAT A DAMNED FOOL! Perfect high ranking war crime officer! Totenkompf SS Field Marshall Franks! "We had to gas the jews, we were ordered to...it was for the good of German people! We know what's best for them!"  Sorry, I got a little carried away there. I get so damned pissed when people talk of crap like that, this is AMERICA, LAND OF THE FREE, not America, land of the totalitarian fucks!  I let slept on this and whether to send it to you or not, with a clear mind.  I decided to, unedited. I know he's not a Nazi, nor a member of the Totenkompf SS (the murderous fucks that guarded concentration camps). I was quite simply, pissed.  –Robert” 

At first when I read this I was pissed off too…  But read it again carefully… He isn't saying this is what he wants - for the country to be turned on his ear... he is saying that that is what he thinks will happen.   Scary thing is...  I think he is right.   Every time something bad happens - we loose rights.  A big shooting - we loose guns.  A some planes are hi-jacked, and you can't have nail clippers on a plane anymore... Soldiers in airports... Profiling, background checks you didn't agree to, your email is read by some analysts near D.C...  I think Franks sounds regretful that this is a possible outcome of a WMD attack within the US... but he is right - that's a very possible outcome.  We have active SAM launchers all around D.C. right now. Troops march around with weapons held ready, or slung over a shoulder, loaded and on "safe". Makes you appreciate the freedoms we still think we have.

I got an email the other day from Chris Muir thanking me for the link I have in the links section.  Chris is the cartoonist who does “Day by Day”, an excellent daily cartoon series that is worth reading and I consider it to be the best since Calvin and Hobbes retired.   It’s cool to get a thanks for link from someone that you admire.  At one point in time I could have considered myself to be a cartoonist of sorts, but stopped once I realized I was a no-talent hack.  That being said I am still virtually undefeated in “Pictionary”.          

Dec 26th, Friday, 1234hrs: A little bird sent me this link.   In yet another poor attempt at making the AR-15 a better weapon for entry teams, yet another company has fitted yet another modified 12 gauge shotgun under the barrel.  I first saw this in the movie Predator with an M-16/Winchester combo.  This concept takes it a bit farther my giving the shotgun a huge fat box magazine hanging off the gun like a giant swollen scrotum.    Yeah, that’s much nicer… more rounds is always good… but just looking at it makes me feel itchy. 

I have a better solution to this problem.  Just cut the useless M-16 off the top of it and you might have something there.  The perfect entry gun is already made, and has been for some time… the 14 inch Benelli M1.  Load it so the first 3 shots are “Master Key” rounds and the rest are 00 Buck and there you go.    Or even better yet – ditch the tube fed configuration altogether and roll out with a Saiga 12 gauge.  This is an AK-47 based gun that looks like an AK, feels like an AK, sports 8 round mags that you can change as fast as an AK… yet it fires full-attention-getting 12 gauge rounds.   If you want your entry teams to really rock – this is what you give them.  Not this.

Is it just me, or is it funny as hell that to make the AR-15 a better weapon, they have to attach a weapon to it?  I think that’s funny.  As soon as I looked up that link, I started laughing.  I got hiccups from laughing just because of that.  I mean, man!  Look at that thing!  It’s like something from Warhammer 40,000.  It’s ludicrous!  But hey – at least it makes the AR-15 BETTER.

News from the Fridge.  I found that I had a few hits from that site and I had never heard of it.  Thanks for the link.  Good site.  Worthy of linkage in return.   I also put up another selected site, Tarrackin's Home Scroll.  This guy is an ogre in his own right from New Zealand.  Horde member, frequent reader, all around good guy.  Mark your bookmarks accordingly.

0100hrs:  The Day After Christmas.  Across the country every store in America – and even around the world – are going to be nuts with people returning stupidass gifts or gifts that don’t work or both.  Not us.  Nothing needs to be returned, nothing came DOA… we are staying away from the stores as much as possible… meaning we may have to go to get food stuffs, but that’s it.  No sales.  No bargain hunting… none of that.  On the menu we have family fun activities planned… games and stuff… playing with all the new toys.  The Ogre Boys have been playing the new “Game Cube” tonight and battled each other in “Super Mario Smash Brothers” or something like that.   Tomorrow I’m looking forward to playing my “Lord of the Rings edition RISK” board game.  If I have anyone that wants to play against me.  Risk is a serious game.  I’m not a nice guy playing that.  I go for blood.   Let’s see… oh… we have like a dozen radio controlled cars to race tomorrow.  From cars the size of a “Hot Wheels” to a giant red Ford Bronco 4X4 and everything in between… Gotta race those tomorrow.   Now, before you thing Ogre is all about greed for merchandise, let me tell you – it’s not about that.  What it’s about is spending time with the family and having fun together.  We could have done nothing at all in the way of gifts and we would have fun playing something together anyways… Uno or Pokemon cards… doesn’t matter.  It’s all about the family.  That’s where our focus is and that’s all that matters to us.  But that big red Ford 4X4 is pretty cool.

I am so glad that the US isn’t the only country (or alliance of countries in this case) that are wasting money on such bogus pursuits as launching probes at Mars.  Looking for water?  Guys, it doesn’t matter if you find fountains of milk and honey… we are not going to Mars any time soon.  I think it’s a huge waste of our money.  In this case, it’s a waste of Europe’s money, but we have our own probe doing a flyby any moment now.  “Oh, well, it’s important for us to do this because it teaches us more about ourselves.”  I had someone give me that.  Seriously.  My answer?  “Get your palm read.”   I don’t care if we find God’s own diary with the entry “Well, this planet is screwed.  Time to go to Plan B on the next Rock in.”  I don’t care if we find a flying saucer pulled over near a crater besides one of the Martian canals with a little green guy flagging the probe down asking for a jump start… it doesn’t matter.  It would have no effect on the fact that Howard Dean is a moron that wants to get into the white house… It has no effect on Hillary Clinton crying on TV that she has been accused of murder – while at the same time fingering the FBI files of her enemies under the table.   Her and OJ are still after the real killers.  It makes no difference to John “Effed” Kerry who just mortgaged his house to stay in the campaign, as if he had an even remote chance now.    I’m not saying that Space Exploration should be banned or anything.  I just don’t think it should be a part of the Federal Budget.  You want to explore space?  Knock your self out.  Burt Rutan is working on this right now, and you know what?  His awkward and gangly looking piece of shit anime rocket/plane combo has a lot more potential than anything NASA has on the table.  I mean come on, NASA shelved the whole replacement for the Space Shuttle, leaving these 20 year old POS craft in service for an indefinite period of time.  If the Space Shuttle as a car – you wouldn’t even have trade in value on it.  But hey, at least you have a clear title right?  Might as well drive it till the wheels fall off, right?  Come on, the last one was knocked out by a piece of damn FOAM.  That should tell you something.   Screw NASA.  If anything – if ANYTHING – Kill NASA with a merciful bullet to the head and give Rutan NASA’s budget – he is the only guy with balls big enough for an Explorer anyways.   At least Rutan will give is lots of cool new designs to look at for the next EAA airshow…. So at least we will get something out of the space program for once.

Drudge reported a story that all the insurgents in Iraq are tied to only 5 families over there.  Wont be long till we have all of them rounded up now.  Good.  This is progress.  This is good news.  This means the war over there has a light at the end of the tunnel and real progress is soon to be possible.  I bet Howard Dean is going to have some retarded comment on this tomorrow.    Should be interesting.   (Oh, looks like tomorrow is actually later today now.)

Speaking of Howard Dean… he is now coming out as a strong Christian.  Can he do that? I mean seriously, with Political Correctness as the Religion of the Left, can they even allow this guy to say he is Christian?  I thought the “Bellowing Bible Thumpers” were supposed to be Conservatives.    Dean is fishing for swing voters here.  What he is doing is playing to every group he can.  Tomorrow he will probably be fishing with some Native Americans in Seattle.  This is politics… but in it’s lowest form.  Especially when he is espousing views counter to his own party.  The Left doesn’t believe in Jesus.  I’m sorry – they don’t.  It’s the Left that has been fighting Jesus more harshly than even the Romans who crucified him, thanks to the Left’s attack dogs in the ACLU.  No ten commandments in court rooms, no prayers in schools, and no nativity scenes in December on public grounds… all things brought to you by ACLU litigation.  It’s even effected us here in Ultra Right Wing Conservative Utah… not because we don’t want a nativity here in our small town – but because we don’t want to get sued for it.    And now this Liberal candidate has the gall to say how Christian he is?  I consider this to be a slap in the face of all Christians of every flavor… just like Dean’s slap on everyone in the South.  Scroo Dean.  

Dec 25th, Thursday:  MERRY CHRISTMAS To all of the Horde and to all my other readers.   I'm just popping in to say this and that if I haven't responded to your emails, I will.  We are having a fantastic white Christmas here in Utah today - no, that's not a racist thing - it's a snow thing.  We got about 3 to 4 inches depending on where you look... it all fell last night and it's still falling lightly right now.   This means sledding followed by large amounts of hot chocolate and other festive goodies.  The Ogre Boys have all been properly spoiled with overwhelming gifts of love from friends and family from across the country and around the world.  MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Dec 23rd, Tuesday: 1100hrs:   Let’s see… today’s chores – replace the tail lights and windshield wipers in the Jeep and replace the seat.  Yeah. I was supposed to have done that yesterday, but I couldn’t finish it.  I have a magic power… I haven’t mentioned this in awhile, so for the new readers here – Ogre is a Wizard.  Seriously.  I am magic.  A Mage.  I can round off ANY bolt – anywhere – any time – without turning it.  So I have the seat with 2 out of 4 bolts still attached and now perfectly round.  Not only is this frustrating but it’s also painful because I just about cut the tip of my trigger finger off when the wrench slipped and the bolt went circular.   Very painful.  I’ll be okay, but I wont be pulling a trigger for awhile.  Try typing without using your index finger of your right hand.  It’s a bitch.  It really is.  So, today I am going to have to find something to make those round bolts come loose.  I’m thinking of just breaking them off and buying a pair of new bolts to attach the new seat.  Yeah, that would work.  Involves a big fucking hammer… I’m down with that.  Fuck those bolts.  The new seat comes from a Jeep Cherokee a few years newer and a few levels higher than my Cherokee.  Meaning it’s more comfortable, nice side and back support, more adjustments.  Should be great.  Once I get it in.  Fucking bolts. 

Christmas Shopping.  I am so done with it.  I have come to the realization that I absolutely hate Christmas shopping.  It’s a pain in the ass.  Stressful.  Counter to the very Christmas spirit that we are trying to celebrate.   I am NEVER doing it again!  Shit.  I still have someone on the list.  Crap… Okay, time to put the jacket back on.  Put on the spiked elbow pads… and head out.  Maybe after I finish this hot chocolate…    

Birds are getting chopped up by the windmills used to generate energy.  As a result, the tree-huggers are all upset.  “Save the Birds!” They want to put an end to the wind farm thing.  Wouldn’t you know it… finally a clean energy source, but the cost is in blood.  This story was mentioned on Boots & Sabers and this is the comment that I made there:  They should quit crying about it and turn this into another resource.  Put up big catcher nets to catch the falling dead birds... process the meat and use it to feed the homeless.  Process the feathers to use as stuffing for Christmas toy bears for the homeless kids.  A win-win situation.  

Kim duToit says: “I own an M1 Carbine because it's a WWII veteran and may have been used to kill Nazis or Japs during the 1940s. (Too bad it wasn't used against the French, but there's still time.)”   It is possible that this M1 Carbine was used against the French.  Odds are against it, but it is possible.  I give you a bit of history:  Operation Torch was the US heading into North Africa.  During the opening days, the French wanted to stop is from getting to North Africa.  We fought them for three or four days, during which we destroyed the French Navy and they of course surrendered.   So there is hope, Kim.   There is hope.

Thanks to Velociworld for this link.  Which LOTR character are you? Turns out that I am Boromir.  That’s cool.  Boromir was a stud.  He also got shot a lot.  So I guess we have some things in common.  Yeah, I’d have kept the ring to use it against the enemy.  I’m like that.  Use the enemy’s weapon against them.  I don’t have a problem with that.    Boromir was The Man.

Oh, Velociworld is almost at 20,000 hits.  This is a big step for him… help him out.  Go take a look at his site.     His is often times the only blog to make my laugh out loud. 

While I am talking about other websites, let me point over to the left side of the screen.  I used to have a link to the site “Right Nation”. (No, I’m not going to link it again)  It seems the cat running Right Nation is a giant pussy that doesn’t tolerate dissenting opinion, especially if one is dissenting the opinions of one who bought advertising or made a donation.  If you are conservative and pro-gun, and have not donated – you get banned.  I’ve had a few emails from people that have been banned for no reason whatsoever.  It looks like The Democratic Underground as subverted Right Nation or something.  I have to admit, that while I did like Right Nation for a few things – overall it annoyed the hell out of me.  Unless you give money – you can’t post a new thread.  Unless you give money, you can’t use your own avatar.  Unless you give money, you can’t read many of the forums.  Hey, I understand the cost of this kind of thing.  I know what it takes.  Time and Money… I understand that.  But I would suggest that if you gave people full access to all your features and forums, make people feel at home, then they will be more open to send you some PayPal kudos… more than what you get for your Pay for Content.  Content that isn’t even yours… You are not creating the content – the members posting creates your content.  If you want your content to have any currency, then you need to open that content up to all sides.  Not just the Liberals.   Yup, Right Nation has Liberal lean to it.  As such – the link is removed.  I’ve been given a couple alternatives to Right Nation, but I am still looking at them.

Fucking bolts…

Email from new reader: “Ogre, First of all I'm a big fan of yours and mean to write you someday telling you why (Real quick - I'm a conservative PhD student who just became inetersted in handguns - indeed a rare breed ).  No time today but I wanted to recommend a headache drug that helps me 'cause it seems like you get 'em often. (this is not a solicitation - I have no vested interest in this drug)  First of all I suffer from migraines (infrequent).  I don't know if that's what you get (they say only 10% of all migraine sufferers are us men) but I fiddled with a bunch of remedies 'til this doc in Philly hooked me up with a perscription for FIOROCET.  A lot of docs don't like compound drugs (multiple drugs in one presentation) because they can't control the dose of the individual drugs, but this stuff really works for me. Fioricet (or Esgic or its generic equivalent) contains: Acetaminophen – analgesic. Caffeine - vaso-dilator, thus reducer of blood-pressure.  Butalbital - a mild barbiturate and a muscle relaxant.  I've never taken this stuff and felt out of it (like with vicadin) so you can take fioricet and still function like a normal human being.  I've also never felt the NEED to take this stuff (if you know what I mean).   I asked my doctor if I can take fioricet for bad non-migraine headaches and he said yes.  Obviously you should consult your doctor. They say Immutrex works for migraines but there are medical risks (like 1 in 1000 people suffering from a heart attack) and since my headaches aren't that bad I don't partake.  Hope this was helpful.  HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!   (I think santa might have to make a special trip for your Aircraft Carrier) –Wojo”   Thanks for the email Wojo.  I’ll look into Fiorocet.  It doesn’t cause anal leakage does it?

Another email from a new reader:  “Hey Ogre,  I just discovered your page, and I must say, it's interesting reading.   Noticed that you hadn't found a holster for your XD… The leather holsters and the fabric ones designed for the H&K USP fit pretty well. I'm using a Bianchi Accumold for mine and am pretty happy with it. Dug it out of a close-out bin and got it for twelve bucks. Am now looking for a shoulder rig that won't empty my wallet.   Also, recently Fobus has released their molded holsters to fit the XD. I haven't seen one, but have one for my Taurus '92 and really don't mind it. It's light and does not rattle like some do. Hope to get one for the XD for Christmas! (Fiance does not mind that I'm a gun nut - gotta love her!)   Regarding mags: I've done the Beretta mag mods, and yes, they work, but they stick out a smidge. Get the Springfield mags for the .40 S&W. They will hold 15 nine mil rounds and fit flush. You might have to tweak the feed lips a little, but I didn't. Also, they seem to be much better mags than the run-of-the-mill Beretta replacements.  Phil”    Thanks for the email, Phil.  However I no longer have an XD… I traded it for my S&W 696.  I do that a lot.  I’m a gun-slut.  Name a gun, I’ve probably owned it for a month or two.  However, this 696 is one I am probably going to keep it around for some time.   

Okay, that's it for now - Time to head out. 

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

Dec 22 Monday, 0900hrs: I don’t have much time to post anything today… I’ll get to some emails tonight maybe.  I have located a seat for my Jeep and I’m going to get it and install it today if I can… and then I have some more ho-ho-ho business to attend to.  An exchange of something for my boys.  I got them something and discovered I got the wrong thing.  Argh.  Sure, they would be happy with it – but when little kids write letters to Santa and all that… They are small boys, so I indulge them when possible.

Many people have asked what I want for Christmas.  I only want one thing.  It’s out of Norway and it’s so cool that it puts Norway in Ogre’s Favored Nation Status.  This is what I want here.  I would name it the SS Mad Ogre of course, and what would I do with it?  Live on it for one.  Outfit it with broadcast capability and park it off the shore of Cuba and taunt Castro for the rest of his miserable life… About 2 years left maybe?  What else?  Use it as a mobile business center for off shore web hosting…Data Bank... something William Gibson-ish...  And when I’m feeling like it – use it to conduct privateering operations… oh, there are a lot of things that could be done with it.  Open invitation for any Member of The Horde to come hangout when ever they want.  You’ll have to charter your own helicopter to bring you out to the ship and pick you pack up… That us of course unless I get my own helicopter or two for COD duty.  And for that purpose I am thinking of a pair of Mi-35 HIND E choppers outfitted with drop tanks for extended range… Yes, they could be outfitted for fire support as the case may be. 

That’s all I want for Christmas.

I still assert that the M-24 Hind is one of the most capable helicopters in the world for military operations.  The US should be using them.  The only real complaint about them is that they are less maneuverable than US Helicopters.  Maybe so... but the US has no helicopter in the class of the Hind.  (BTW, the MI-35 is the same thing, just badged to mark it as "For Export"... meaning the dashboard has English or French or Spanish on it instead of Russian, from what I understand.)  Some guys distain the Hind... but they have got to be nucking futs.  Take the lift capacity of a 1.5 Blackhawks, add to that the firepower of an A-10 Warthog, and give it the range of a Sea Stallion. (I know, you would have to reconfigure the bird to get all these capabilities maximized - but they are possible)  You get all this for the price of a V-22 Osprey's seatbelt.  Come to think of it - increase my order for 2 to 5 of them.  I'd go with 6 but it's a small Carrier.  Put 2 huge loud speakers on one of the Hinds for when we all fly in at once we can play "Flight of the Valkries" because I have always wanted to do that.

Dec 21st, Sunday: 2200hrs:  I am pleased to announce the completion and posting of the Guns of Equilibrium.  I don't have another one planned... and I think this one might be the last one unless something compels me to think otherwise.  

2000HRS: Contraception, prophylactics, birth control, foot care, whopper wrapper… Thank heavens you don’t have to ask the pharmacist for these any more. But now you find them right between Dr. Schools odor eaters and antacid tablets? What’s up with that?

One time I was at one store and they had them out by the shampoo. I was standing there reading and looking (it’s like buying a car now days). “Do you want ribs for her pleasure? Yes or no? Towing package? Yes or no? Undercoating??? So I was standing there and this girl comes up – Can I help you find anything? I guess she was thinking I was stuck in crème rinses or something… me being by the shampoos and all. “Yes I’m trying to pick out a condom and You don’t have them in Godzilla size with ribs, do you think ribs make a difference? She just passed out right there…poor thing.

More than any other item for sale – more than even tampons – condoms spark more extra sales than anything else – you can’t just buy a box of condoms, you have to buy other things, like a head of lettuce, a bottle of ketchup, light bulbs, a can of chili a tennis racket, 75 bucks worth of stuff for a 7 dollar pack of rubbers. And wouldn’t you know – that’s the item that doesn’t beep? Beep, beep, beep, *NO BEEP* Then she starts swinging it back and forth and higher and higher until she’s holding it over her head, then finally calls for help. Some times she might flip the blinking light on then stand there with condoms in her hand like you’ve just been busted by airport security or she’ll call on the intercom “What’s the price code for Trojan Armor Warrior Chrome Swords? With sequins?”

Why did they have to name them Trojans anyway? Have you been to a high school history class when they mention the Trojan wars? You got all the guys giggling like a bunch of cheerleaders. At least they didn’t name them Spartans because the Spartans were all gay. Not that there is anything wrong with gay people we need more interior decorators don’t we? Maybe not on T.V. Queer Eye for the Straight Guy?   Yeah those guys can come over to my place and fix it up any time.  Leave your Trojans at home…That’s all I’m asking.

The only thing worse than buying condoms is putting them on and taking them off. It’s like putting a rubber band on a newspaper roll

"Don’t snap it!"

*snap*

“Oh that was a little uncomfortable,” but on the inside you are like, “AAAAAAAARGH!”  Then you are rolling up into a ball and thinking, "I wonder where you go to apply to be a Tibetan Monk. Do they have recruiting stations like the Marines do?”  You’re thinking this and she’s like, “Come on baby...”

“Come on? To where? The ER?  “No, baby, I’m not… I’d… I got a headache.”

“OH, but I love you”

“If you loved me you’d get the pill…”

But the pill, that’s no good either. You know ho that stuff works right? Changes her hormones. Don’t think for a minute these are any safer for your little warrior than the condoms were. No way! These pills, these are like Jeckle & Hyde pills. She’s all sweet and loving until *swallow*gulp* It’s like PMS Rage Wonder Woman. “I’m going to slap your momma for not teaching you to put the seat up and then leave it down. She starts making phone calls to who knows who talking about you “He did that too, yes, I have scissors, oh sssh, here he comes” So now all the sudden your married to Al Qaeda and you keep looking over your shoulder. So what can you do?  Condoms – no – pills – no way – spermicidal jelly? You know what that stuff feels like? I only tried it once. Once was enough. I only put cologne on my nuts once too. Hey – it was a hot day and it was really funky down there didn’t have time for a shower thought I’d freshen it up a little... *WOW*  Was that a mistake!

Next thing you know, you got your junk laying in the sink and your running cold water over it and your thinking “Can I get cable TV and a Good internet connection in Tibet?

The birth control thing. It’s a tuffy. Is Sex really worth it? You know they say eating chocolate gives you the same feelings as if you’ve had sex. And then they wonder why so many people are over weight!

1300HRS:  Got an email this morning that had been filtered into the junk folder, but I caught it anyways.  This little gem of an email is perhaps the best example of the type of emails I sometimes get, but ignore.  Why am I responding to it?  Only to show The Horde the level of intelligence that is typical of the average AR-15 Zealot.  This email is from Steve Moore:

“Why I hate the M-16/AR-15 Rifle and variants 

NOT TRUE AT ALL.   AR 15 the best thire is.”

Steve, I’m impressed.  That must have taken you all day to type. You show the same stern fortitude and resolve that has put the AR-15 into the Military and has kept it there for so long.  Bravo.  You must be shocked and in awe of the V-22 Osprey and the Stryker vehicle too.  You know what, Steve?  Because it’s the holidays, and I’m feeling jolly… I’m going to send you a game for your PlayStation2.  You have one don’t you?  Sure you do.  Hope you like it, and you have a very merry Christmas… Okay?  Oh, now wipe off your chin… your drooling again.  Yes, you had your email published on MadOgre.com... your mom was right - you are special.  Run along now.

Now that I have that out of the way... I have family in from Chicago so we are doing a big to do over at the In-Law's house today.  I'll try to get what I all wrote in my notebook typed up and up-loaded later today.  2 and a half pages worth... plus my Guns of Equilibrium that I have been talking about. 

Dec 20th, Saturday: 2330hrs: More on Return of the King.  I’m still processing this movie… You can’t take it all in at once.   Anyways… Am I the only one that was choked up during Pippin’s song and Faramir’s charge?  And totally disgusted at the Stuart of Gondor?  Well, this is good, because this Stuart of Gondor was supposed to be nuts and unlikable according to the book, and this was captured on film well.  Pippin’s song was incredible.  I’m glad Peter Jackson did that – it added so much weight to that part of the movie – and that part of the book that I have often scanned past getting to the big battle. I want that on MP3… I want the whole sound track.   I have one word for that battle that you skip to while reading… that word is “Grond”.  The book says that “Spells of Ruin lay upon it”.  I think that comes across in the movie.  Grond was AWESOME, and yet another thing I was looking for and not disappointed by.  In fact I was impressed because it looked better than I imagined it.

I didn’t see ROTK tonight… no… instead I went and watched “The Nutcracker” as performed by the Uintah Basin Ballet Company.   Excellent performance.  And just because that’s my Mother-In-Law’s dance company, that doesn’t mean I am obligated to say anything nice about it… not at all.  In fact she knows that if something sucks that I will tell her that it sucked – but this Nutcracker did not suck at all.  It was one of the best I have seen.  It really was.  I enjoyed it.

What really sucked was that an Ex-Student of my Mother-in-law, who opened up a competing dance studio, snuck up to the balcony and like a slimy thief and video taped the performance so she could rip off the choreography.  That’s like breaking into someone’s business and stealing the inventory to resell it.  She had no business recording that.  None at all.  Of course she absolutely has to try to get choreography from someplace because while my Mother In Law did teach her how to be a very good dancer – she is utterly without talent when it comes to creating her own dances.  I’ve seen her dance team perform her own choreography and I was embarrassed for her and her students.   Without her own choreography skills, she will forever remain the pathetic hack that she has tonight proven herself to be.

My wife and I put our Christmas money together for each others presents and picked up a little digital camera.  Nothing fancy, but it takes good pictures at 2.5 megapixels... but it was only 99 bucks.   It's not the 5 megapixel that I wanted for only 290, but really, what would I do with that kind of hardware?  This one is perfect for snapshots of the kids to send to Grandmas and Grandpas living out in Virginia…. And for taking pictures of things for Mad Ogre – like guns and dogs.  Speaking of which – I took pictures of all the above.  I’ll upload them later.  I’m tired right now. I have a lot of stuff for tomorrow's update so be ready for it.  

Dec 19th, Friday: 2100hrs: The Jeep:  Mrs. Ogre brought it home… I don’t know what the mechanic did to it… I really don’t.  Because instead of sounding like a Stuka, it now sounds like a new Honda Accord.  I’m not exaggerating.  The engine is running smooth and quiet and it is amazing.  New Honda Accord.  I kid you not.  The power?  It has power now.  It has all the power and more.  I suspect he put in a whole new engine… one that just looks like the old one.  I am amazed and stunned.  I shall have to talk to this guy Monday and ask just what it was he did… this isn’t our Jeep!  Our jeep sounded like it was about to launch the invasion of Poland – this jeep is more quiet than a U-boat.   I’m stunned.  I’m also worried that Mrs. Ogre will now want a good stereo put in it!  How much did this cost?  I was expecting $300… nope.  $60.   Incredible.  There is a Santa.

Moammar Gadhafi, Ruler of Libya totally caves on the whole WMD issue.  Must have seen that the US isn’t going to take any more of Libya’s bullshit.  And we wouldn’t be.  For those that are not up on Current Affairs and US History, Libya used to be the font of all that was evil when it comes to terrorists.  Who was it in the movie Back to the Future that came riding in a van hanging out the windows with AK-47’s to kill the doctor?  That’s rights.  Terrorists from Libya.  This is actually a good move for them.  They are completely disliked by the rest of the Arab world, Gadhafi himself was called a “Monkey” by the other Arab leaders… so he doesn’t have any friends there to try to appease.  So why not avoid getting his ass kicked?  Because we are so very ready to.  Moammar has been doing a lot to try to play “Nice Guy” since GWB took office.  Chalk this up to another benefit of having a strong US President in Office.  The world becomes a safer place.

Ford’s F-150 gets top honors from the insurance industry for being really safe.  That’s cool.  I guess.  I give the new Ford kudos for being the most ballsy F-150 I’ve ever seen.  It looks good and drives even better.   I test drove one and it about gave me a hard on.   The other cool new ride out there is the new Durango.  Wow.  Very cool.  Maybe someday, I’ll be able to buy a ten year old version. 

I’ve held off on this Bill O’Reilly/Matt Drudge thing.  I think this shows rather clearly that Bill is a gigantic asshole.  Drudge reports facts both good and bad and Bill calls him a threat to Democracy?  I used to like Bill.  I have his book… I’ve even read it.  I like it.  I thought he was very entertaining and enjoyed the way he slammed the morons on his show.  This however is no longer the case… Bill has a darkside that we have just seen.  If he calls a reporter that actually reports facts “a threat to democracy”… Bill can go straight to hell for all I care.  Drudge has a track record of reporting stories both good and bad for Conservatives… most of the time breaking the news before anyone else does – even if it hurts our cause.  Why?  Because he reports the facts the way they teach it in Journalism 101.  Fuck O’Reilly.

My headache has finally gone away and I can think clearly now.  Thank heavens.  Kids are all doing better now too.  I think we are about to kick the whole sickness thing.  Nasty bug we have had… very nasty.  This is in the face of a news report I just heard that a 4^th person has died from the flu here in Utah.  Scary, but I’m not panicking… not even worried.   

1700HRS:  Ogre Crack.   Normally, I don’t like junk food.  I don’t like sweets.  I can go months without eating any…  but there are two things that can’t help but to love.  #1 is Swedish Fish.  Stack three together and bite through all of them at once… mmmm… gummi goodness…  But I have found over the last 2 years or so I have another weakness.  Hostess Raspberry Filled Powdered Doughnuts.  The normally come in a box of 6… but unless I am sharing, that’s about 4 too many.  I have found that they are packaging these gems in two doughnut packs.  That’s the perfect size pack for the perfect junk food.  These things are like heaven blessed.  I love them.  I can’t help but to get a pack when I see them. 

Guns and Flags.  Recently someone on a discussion board that I help moderate got into a pissing contest with another member because he used a flag as a backdrop for his gun photo.  The gun in question is a CZ-52… so I have to give the photo some bonus points for that… and the fact it’s the best looking 52 I’ve ever seen.  Anyways, this one member (or should I call him “Member”?) is bent out of shape because of the flag, got into a pissing contest over it and the photo guy in question did not “remove the image” as demanded… Member went and “Reported” the post as if it was a violation of forum rules.   Gimmie a break.  He breaks out US Code showing the appropriate use of the flag… where use in a photograph as a back drop for a gun is not listed.  Please, take the corn cob out of your ass.  You know what?  I’m using that photo as my WALLPAPER now.   Guns and Flags go together like Peanut Butter and Jelly.

“Your Jeep is dying,” the mechanic said.  Really?  No kidding?  Are you serious?  I am so glad we have that professional opinion...  No shit.  We didn’t bring in the jeep to ask that – we brought it in to know what can be fixed to make it better.  Don’t tell me it can’t be done… If you can restore a 34 Ford with all Original parts – you can fix a damned 86 Cherokee!  Hmmm… maybe if we put that 2.2 liter Subaru engine into the Jeep.  Does any Reader know if that is actually possible?  I’ve never heard of such a conversion, but I’ve heard of much more radical ones.  Convert the Cherokee to Subaru power (The best thing about the Suby is that engine) and then I’ll just pick up a used pickup truck.  Ranger needs me to have a pickup truck.  He loves to go for rides, but with often muddy paws, he isn’t getting the chance.

Speaking of Ranger – for lunch today he had a bag of chicken.  A whole bag of boneless chicken breasts that had defrosted but didn’t get cooked in time.  It kinda went off… Ranger got a wiff of it and went nuts.  I figured, hey – if you want it – go for it.  He did the lay on his back with a full tummy thing for the next couple hours.  I do that too, but after a plate of enchiladas.   Ranger is the worlds coolest dog.  No, he doesn't do tricks... or even obey simple commands like "Come here"... but he is still very cool.  I love him.  He is just like me in many respects. Er... or disrespects.

I don’t get this whole Yu-Gi-Oh thing.  Why on earth is such a thing so popular among the kids these days?  I thought Pokemon was bad enough… but this Yu-Gi-Oh thing is just sick.  The original japan version has the character battling to save his older gay lover or something like that and the US version has changed it to a Grandfather or something.  If you watch the show you can see the sexual innuendo and I really don’t appreciate this in a kids cartoon.  But in Japan it is not a kids cartoon – it’s for homosexual pedophiles.  This is why I don’t let my kids play with the cards or watch the cartoon.  Yu-Gi-Oh is evil… simple as that.  I have no problem with homosexuals… but even homosexuals have to draw the line at pedophiles.  Pedophiles are not to be tolerated.  Michael Jackson should face the gallows if convicted.

1030: Sorry for the lack of update yesterday.  1, I was still stunned by the Return of the King, and 2, the flu had me.  Today, my headache is the worse than it has ever been.  Judas Priest!  My skull is pulsing.

Peter Jackson is my new hero. 

He took Lord of the Rings, as a whole, and put it on film in a way that no one else could have done.  They stuck to the books very well and didn’t try to jazz it up very much.   The acting is outstanding at every level and I can find no fault with any of it.  I know the changes that they made from the books and I can see why they did it and I’m okay with them. Overall this is the most incredible filmmaking EVER.  That being said, I am sorry for all those people who have seen this movie, without ever reading the books first.  That cartoon above is no joke... my bladder was killing me before it ended and I was able to break for the (crowded) restroom.

Email from my Bro back in Virginia:  “Well, once again, Mad Ogre speaks truth. Lord of the Rings: Return of the King is..... I'm not worthy to speak of it. But there was one problem that I saw. It was too short. It needed to be at least six more hours longer. That's my only complaint. Supposedly the extended edition is a full hour longer. Oh boy! I'm just counting the days. I'll just say one thing...Witch King. Oh yeah.”

The way the Witch King died – that was better than I imagined it.  The vacuum cave in… that was so sweet.  I was looking forward to that scene and like the rest of the movie, not disappointed.

The Million Mile Jeep is in the shop this morning.  There is something going on with the engine that is beyond my ability to fix.  We can’t get it to drive over 35 MPH.  The engine just doesn’t have the grunt.  That and I busted the front stabilizer bars when I took it off road last time so the thing feels like its drunk or something.  So those are getting fixed… One thing that could be going wrong with the engine – a clogged up catalytic converter.  This could be putting too much back pressure on the system and is essentially choking it out.  If that is the issue, I’ll just cut the cat out.   We’ll see.

Dec 17th, Wednesday, 2300hrs:  Tonight I saw the movie Lord of the Rings: Return of the King.

I am stunned.

I have to sit down now.

Talk to you tomorrow.

Dec 16th, Tuesday, 2000hrs:  The latest from the Left is the argument that “We found Saddam – no big deal – but where are the WMD’s”.   Let’s see… The UN Inspectors documented a full 20% of Saddam’s stockpiles as unaccounted for.  We found labs and even mobile labs for further creation of more WMD’s.  We even have Democrat Candidates dropping hints that that they knew Saddam had them.  On top of all of this we have thousands and thousands of DEAD BODIES killed by Saddam’s WMD’s.   My Hell People!  What do you guys need?  Anthrax mailed to you PERSONALLY? 

Ogre Hit by the Clue Bat:  You know, for so long I have been talking about the Clintons and John F’d Kerry and Al Gore and Howard Dean and calling them stupid.  I just realize that they are not stupid.  So I would like to offer my sincere apology to you guys.   You are NOT stupid.  In fact, you cats are absolutely brilliant.  Catering to the brain damaged and mentally retarded masses that vote Democrat like it was fucking religion in order to gain power and wealth… It’s like “The Perfect Caper”.  As an 80’s rock band would sing, “money for nothing and the chicks for free”.  Smart move.  Not only are your constituents so content to blindly follow your lack-luster and uncoordinated leads… they are even willing to look at black and white fact and they’ll claim it to be otherwise.  I have always said it – but not understood the fully potential of my own ‘saying’… “Never Underestimate The Power Of Stupid”.

Correction:  The above paragraph was in sarcasm.  I still fully believe the Democrat Party Leadership to be populated almost entirely of corrupt and retarded weasels. To check the IQ of the Party, I need only look to Democrat IQ Meter nailed to my house just outside my back door.  Just as I suspected… They have the IQ of mouse droppings.  Wait a second… someone in the back of the room said no.  No?  I give you THIS.  Documented Proof that what I have said is the truth.  The Democrats are without morals, convictions, direction, a platform, and a purpose.  They have reduced themselves to the level of a mediocre frat house.   Dare I say it?  If they stoop any lower… they will become the U.N.!

1500hrs: I think Glenn Beck has said it best.   Wow.  Listen to this.  This is the best rant I have ever heard.   I wish I was in an area that had the Glenn Beck show on the radio because he is undoubtedly the best Radio Personality out there.  His show is awesome.  If you have him in air where ever your at – give him an ear.  At the very end of his monologue here, after he blasts A&F for it’s pornomag-catalog for kids clothes… He mentions Fox’s “A Simple Life” show.  Have you seen this show?  First off, Paris Hilton is not attractive.  She has the body of a teenage boy and the face of a Lemur.  Actually, she looks like an alien.  The only reason she is perceived to be attractive is that she is skinny.  Guess what, you can still be skinny and be awkward looking.  Second, her short sidekick looks like she is Michael Moore’s daughter.  These two – and you have to give them credit for this – are amazing… they did the IMPOSSIBLE.  These girls have made Anna Nicole Smith look brilliant by comparison.

PARIS HILTON:  Sexy Babe or Alien - You decide!

Speaking of Radio… Tomorrow morning I am going in to the station to talk about things, do the voice test and all that jazz.   Looking forward to it.  Now if I can just get a babysitter for 5 sick boys who are all home with the flu.   Anyways, if all goes well, I might be on the air this Saturday.

President Bush as done yet another good deed:  Signs and Anti-Spam bill.  Sweet!  Now if only he would do the right thing and push for the AWB to disappear…

Not much to write about today.  I've got a migraine headache and my boys are all sick... They are all sleeping right now and I have some Bing Crosby playing... very peaceful.  I think I'm going to take a nap too. 

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